by ken power August 28, 2007
by wakawakacarlos September 8, 2010
basically yolanda hadid telling her daughter gigi to eat half an almond after gigi said she was about to faint
„you know how my mom projects her body insecurities onto me?“
„yeah, she thinks we're still in the 90s. such an almond mom“
„yeah, she thinks we're still in the 90s. such an almond mom“
by materialgwoorl April 1, 2023
Heaven in candy form. chocolate, toffee, almonds and walnuts.
The thing you use to make people fall in love with you.
The thing you use to make people fall in love with you.
Friend: you want some almond roca?
Friend 2: is it good?
Friend 3: dont ask just eat it. Stick it in your mouth, chew, swallow and then express you joy!
Friend 2: is it good?
Friend 3: dont ask just eat it. Stick it in your mouth, chew, swallow and then express you joy!
by iBadass December 19, 2008
The male version of a camel toe where you can see the outline of the dudes junk from pants that are too tight.
by Duane Ball May 17, 2004
The act of deceiving a receptive sexual partner into thinking you're unwrapping and putting on a condom, while in reality you're simply unwrapping and consuming a candy bar. Success depends in large part on your partner's non-visualization of your hands and penis, either by means of a darkened room or sexual positioning (e.g. doggy style), as well as lack of familiarity with the feel of a bare vs. sheathed penis. May be additionally satisfying if you're able to consume the candy bar while actively having bareback intercourse.
"Sarah was drunk and totally DTF last night, but I didn't have any jim hats on hand, so I just turned off the lights and pulled an almond joy."
"My blind girlfriend was a virgin before we dated, so I felt pretty comfortable giving her an almond joy without risking an STD."
That dude doesn't like to bareback, but he's so high on ecstasy he doesn't even know that the guy behind him just slipped it in almond joy style.
"My blind girlfriend was a virgin before we dated, so I felt pretty comfortable giving her an almond joy without risking an STD."
That dude doesn't like to bareback, but he's so high on ecstasy he doesn't even know that the guy behind him just slipped it in almond joy style.
by SchlitzKicker January 9, 2011
I don't know what was wrong with me last night; I finally got James naked and I gagged on his dick, and it was only four inches long! I can usually deep throat to 8 inches but sometimes I still choke on an almond.
by Lexxtacular November 2, 2011