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The Way Of The Douche

A way of life. It's often learned through a grueling 2 hour escalator ride up a mountain to the sacred temple of the douche. Inside you will find a room filled with Vanilla Ice posters, and the legend himself, Vanilla Ice, slouched over chanting his famous *Meeeeeeeeeee* mantra whilst fixated on his own posters. He will gaze into your soul, and if he feels you are douchy enough, and can improve, he will teach you 'The Way Of The Douche'.

Pro Tips:

- Don't wear a baseball cap with the brim curved and authenticity stickers removed. Rookie mistake.
- Orange spray tan is a nice addition
- Tell Vanilla "Cool as Ice" is the best movie you've ever seen straight faced.
- Call him "ma boi" and "homeslice" and such. Oh and "O.D" (Original Douche), he loves that.

If Kanye is filling in for Vanilla, then re-adjust strategy for Kanye. Say things like "Yeah, Beyonce should've won", "$300?, I would pay $600 for one of your plain white tees!" and "your creative genius knows no limits".
"I heard Bieber is learning "The Way of the Douche""

"Yeah man. Second time up that escalator now."

"Whoa."
by Kittles48 September 19, 2018
mugGet the The Way Of The Douchemug.

Douche cream

The gunk that comes out after a girl douches
I ate that douche cream with a spoon after she douched last night
by Jeffythefry June 20, 2016
mugGet the Douche creammug.

Deca-douche

Adj. Used to describe someone that is 10x a regular douche.
Jackson gets on my nerves every single day, but today he’s being a total deca-douche!”
by BusnMom April 16, 2024
mugGet the Deca-douchemug.

Douche Bag

Occasionally a turd who's not the nicest. They're looking for weak people or socially awkward people to be a fricking wad to.

Just ignore them and they'll probably go away. Or you can turn the tables and be a douche back. Just don't mess up or else he'll call over buddies and decide to scuffle with you.
"You're a douche bag!"
by CyanideOverload November 11, 2019
mugGet the Douche Bagmug.

Douche Nozzle

Someone who pulls up behind me at an intersection so close that I cannot see their right turn signal. If they weren't so close and up my tailpipe I would have been able to see their right turn signal and I would have pulled up further so they could have turned right.
That douche nozzle just flipped me off because I wouldn’t give them enough space to turn right !
by Shamu9000 May 20, 2022
mugGet the Douche Nozzlemug.

Douche

"Why would you sign a law telling women whether they can have abortions or not? That makes you a douche!"
by Fluthy March 18, 2022
mugGet the Douchemug.

Douche nozzle

One with an excessive quality of douchiness. Someone who does moronic actions for the sole intent of douchifying everybody's day.
That douche nozzle just cut me off in traffic! I'm gonna ram my car so far up his ass he won't be able to shit for a week!
by Everyone's Favorite Nerd March 24, 2016
mugGet the Douche nozzlemug.

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