Jesus Lighting is the result of a camera focusing on you with light in the background resulting in the person in the photograph being surrounded by heavenly white
Person 1: “How was the visit at the park with your friend?”
Person 2: “Good; very sunny, I took a picture of my friend facing the sun and when I looked at the photo, I got him in Jesus Lighting”
Person 1: “lmao”
*may or may not be based on a true story*
Person 2: “Good; very sunny, I took a picture of my friend facing the sun and when I looked at the photo, I got him in Jesus Lighting”
Person 1: “lmao”
*may or may not be based on a true story*
by roach.baddie September 15, 2023
Jesus's Army are a peaceful Christian organisation who usually drive around to their religious gatherings in rainbow or multi coloured vehicles usually dilapidated vans or mini buses. Jesus's Army love to spread the word of our Lord and Saviour through rustic songs acapella style or often led by tambourine's, maracas,spoons and entry level guitar playing.
Unfortunately due to Jesus's Army only feeling love and seeing good in their fellow man they can often fall foul of being abused by drunken thugs who will initially express a real interest in turning their sad lives around with Jesus's help only to blag free rides to their next watering hole and further cementing their own place in Hell.
Unfortunately due to Jesus's Army only feeling love and seeing good in their fellow man they can often fall foul of being abused by drunken thugs who will initially express a real interest in turning their sad lives around with Jesus's help only to blag free rides to their next watering hole and further cementing their own place in Hell.
Dave we've drank and gambled all our money on fruit machines. We literally only have enough for 4 more pints each with no cash machine visits available and we still need to get home with no money for a taxi.
Fear not there is some rainbow coloured van there with a heavy smell of marijuana and Christian love exuding from it. That is definitely Jesus's Army and if we tell them we are interested in signing up and turning our lives around with the help of the Lord I think we can blag a lift.
Fear not there is some rainbow coloured van there with a heavy smell of marijuana and Christian love exuding from it. That is definitely Jesus's Army and if we tell them we are interested in signing up and turning our lives around with the help of the Lord I think we can blag a lift.
by Another pseudonymal August 05, 2022
Used to describe when something was terrible. Can be used for awkward social interactions, bad-tasting food, an event that was a total let down, or when you have to give great customer service to a total asshole.
*you escape from an awkward social interaction where everyone was struggling and failing miserably to make conversation*
"Man, that tasted like Jesus."
*person eats something rotten*
"Ew! " *spits out food* "Dont eat that, that shit tastes like Jesus!"
"Man, that tasted like Jesus."
*person eats something rotten*
"Ew! " *spits out food* "Dont eat that, that shit tastes like Jesus!"
by Someplace Dude February 29, 2016
by bootsherk March 22, 2018
Dinobot from the 1996 cartoon Beast Wars, known for giving his life to save early human ancestors in eighth episode of the second season; “Code of Hero.”
"Tell Raptor Jesus’ tale to those who ask. Tell it truly, the ill deeds along with the good, and let him be judged accordingly. The rest is silence."
by thegoddamnsiege January 02, 2021
If your priest is a fat fuck call him a chunky Jesus
Any fat Jesus worshippers are called chunky Jesus servants
Any fat Jesus worshippers are called chunky Jesus servants
Person 1:yo yo yo look are priest is a fat bitch
Person 2: lol it’s called a chunky Jesus Carl get your facts right
Person 2: lol it’s called a chunky Jesus Carl get your facts right
by Yummy nut February 20, 2019
by DilandRick January 12, 2017