Oh lord jesus

When someone does something dumb out of no where.
When someone looks dumb.
When something happens unexpectedly.
Jocelyn: "hey, did you see ally's makeup today?"
Arlette: "no why?"
*arlette sees ally's horrifying make up*

Arlette: "oh lord Jesus"
by issasneak August 04, 2017
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Satanic Jesus

Jesus with horns, a pitchfork and a devil's tail adorned with a crown of thorns. He has a shepherd's crook and a pentagram necklace. Ruler of Hellven. He walks on cloven hoof. You must forgive him for everybody's sins since he's taking responsibility for them.
"The rod and the staff of Satanic Jesus is the comforting key to eternal salivation!"
by ANOTHERDEADROMEO April 27, 2023
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Leon and Jesus

Leon and Jesus will be going on their first date today (December 20th, 2023) at the mall. A Leon will arrive exactly at 5:00 PM, not wanting to pardon his lady. Leons are the type of guys who are very gentleman-like and are extremely loyal to their partners. Their are also very highly intelligent and knows when someone tries to take advantage of them.

He doesn't allow cheaters in his life and he is not a simp to be with a woman that has a boyfriend, especially her boyfriend thug. Leon unfortunately has a crazy woman who loves Satan and is a massive control-freak, but his girlfriend Jesus Christ will knock the shit out of her to eternal hell, Jesus being extremely loyal to Leon her boyfriend.

A Leon is very lucky to have such a loyal girlfriend like Jesus that accepts him for who he is, never tried to control him in a manipulative matter, and loves him with unconditional love. That crazy woman with children is an unfaithful, lying, decitful, devil-worshipping, cheating, control racist loser that will literally be with Leon to avoid going to hell. But the prophecy is already written that Leon's girlfriend will punch her to eternal hell forever.

A Leon is a very lucky man to have Jesus Christ in his life.
Leon and Jesus forever in love. No one can separate each other, not even that wicked crazy witch and her equally crazy thug boyfriend.

May God bless them!
by LebanonJames December 20, 2023
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God/Jesus

Jesus and God are the same but Jesus is God's son.
God/Jesus is our Lord and Savior that died on the cross for our sins. God is the father, son, and the holy spirit.
by Ilove_jesus June 10, 2023
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Jesus Crist

The word phrase Jesus Crist would be used to describe a mentally stable drug lord. This drug lord would own a business in Argentina and Portugal and would ship the amazing powders and crystals (drugs) worldwide.
Person 1: Hey, are you Jesus Crist
The apparent Jesus Crist: Yes, it is I Pablo Escobar the one who sells the white stuff.
by Yes i am not gay December 01, 2020
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Jesus Crist

Jesus Crist is a name you would give to a mentally stable young drug lord. They would own a business in Portugal and they would be shipping worldwide.
Person 1: Hey, you're a Jesus Crist.
The apparent Jesus Crist: Yes it is I, Mr Pablo Escobar.
by Yes i am not gay December 01, 2020
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walmart jesus

also called low-bar jesus

noun / the phenomenon of men being praised for the smallest accomplishments. men doing the bare minimum and being worshipped as great men (doing something that women do and DO NOT receive praise for because its seen as their innate responsibility).
"he always changes the baby, hes the best father."
"that's just walmart jesus. the bar is subterranean"
by georgia011 June 09, 2022
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