Idiot Mitten

(noun) Someone who is extremely stupid and forgetful.

Refers to ancient practice of attatching two mittens to a long string and then placing each through opposite sleeves on your coat so that when you remove the mittens you do not lose them.

Wife: "Happy anniversary honey!"

Husband: "Oh, that's right, today is our anniversary"

Wife: "Idiot mitten!"

by Master N May 16, 2006

awkward mittens

level 2 in the "Levels of Awkward". Mittens are just a little bit more awkward then turtles. I mean, think about it...essentially, you're left with one giant, flipper-like finger, and then a thumb, just kinda hanging out there in space. Awkward mittens is done by holding your hands up, facing out, with all the fingers together, and spinning the thumbs.

An example of an awkward mittens moment:

When your friend sees a picture of you and says, "Wow...you didn't have to make yourself look more ugly then you already are."

by SMM Youth Group July 3, 2007

mutton

A square-shaped button commonly found in men's clothing. A mutton can be found mainly in men's shirts, but can also be found on women's blouses, men's boxers, and other types of clothing.

While walking down the street, I spotted a shirt with exactly ten muttons going straight down.

by ChrisElMiamense November 22, 2011

Muttoning

For a Man to show or flaunt his bright white upper thighs.

You see that guy muttoning over there? It looks like a fluorscent light up to his belt.

by M54kings June 23, 2009

mutton dressed as dog dirt

An ugly, often old has been, who's trying to look sexy by wearing a short skirt and make up, making a small improvement from the accident she had with the ugly tree

'Ere, Bri, you seen that old bird in accounts in that short skirt? Aye, mutton dressed as dog dirt

by LoonyBob September 10, 2010

muttonfuck

A man that has sex with sheep.

That dude fucking my sheep was a real muttonfuck.

by gcate June 5, 2019

Manhood Mitten

Any thing worn over the cock and balls, usually a sock

Guy 1: this nudist colony is a great idea
Guy 2: yeah, but its frezzin' balls out here
Guy 1: Its alright, have manhood mittens for everyone!

by Ass-Jackson March 28, 2011