Jesus

An absolute gigachad. He will love you, even if you've sinned. If he lived longer and had a child he'd be the best father no cap. He loves you no matter what you are, whether it be gay, woman, man, child, etc,. He is a forgiving man and sacrificed his own life so people could go to Heaven even if they've sinned in their life. Literally amazing. An absolute gigachad. Even if you hate this man, he will still love you, but it's still a good option to love him if you were or are a Christian.

Bro got crucified and still forgave people, unlike Twitter or YouTube users who won't forgive someone because they dislike a certain show.

#StanGodandJesus
Person 1: I hate myself. No one will ever love me, and I am pathetic. Why can't I just die?

Jesus: But I love you and I always will.

Person 1: I love you.
by HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA September 08, 2022
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Jesus

I am Jesus, bow to me mortal.
I am Jesus obey me or be sent to hell you sinner
by jackjackipod3@gmail.com August 27, 2021
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fucking killer bastard jesus

It is commonly used when someone is bald.(FKBJ for short)
OMFG he is fucking killer bastard jesus.(means he is bald)
I have FKBJ hairstyle(i am bald)
by Fucking erdembayar May 25, 2022
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Jesus Sperm Theory

We are in a universe sized sperm cell from Jesus and it's going normal sperm speed but we are so small it feels like forever
"Jesus Sperm Theory saved my life man"- Jeffrey Epstein
by Saddam Huissain June 18, 2023
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jesus jogando bola

jesus jogando bola
"omg jesus jogando bola!"
by Tavissonic.lover January 06, 2023
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driving jesus

nickname or the act of driving so recklessly that only the Lord Jesus Christ himself can prevent permanent damage and/or death.
bob: « you heard that noise ? »
sue: « no, what was it ? »
bob: « driving jesus got in another accident on the avenue »
by gof August 20, 2024
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