"You going to church today?" "Nah, I'm going to chirch." "What's that?" "It's where you can go and worship our lord and savior Jesus Chrust." "Go fuck yourself."
by Communistically-Delicious May 3, 2018
Get the jesus chrustmug. The Jesus Boob Cult is a place where fags share trauma and a love of phoebe Bridgers while drinking Jesus’s period blood and eating his boobs. The JBC is very selective of its members and will only allow the gayest of the fags and the gayest of the straights to participate in its rituals.
Person one: are you in the Jesus Boob Cult????
Person two: yes but I’m not supposed to tell anyone
Person one: WHAT how did you get accepted, I’ve been trying to get in for months!
Person two: yes but I’m not supposed to tell anyone
Person one: WHAT how did you get accepted, I’ve been trying to get in for months!
by JBC is life September 24, 2021
Get the Jesus Boob Cultmug. To masturbate
Comes from Christian parents telling their kids “Every time you masturbate, Jesus cries”
Jesus is interchangeable with Hod in this context
Comes from Christian parents telling their kids “Every time you masturbate, Jesus cries”
Jesus is interchangeable with Hod in this context
An example of “making Jesus cry”
Friend 1:Did you get laid last night?
Friend 2: No, I was so horny I had to make Jesus cry
Friend 1: Gross, tmi
Friend 1:Did you get laid last night?
Friend 2: No, I was so horny I had to make Jesus cry
Friend 1: Gross, tmi
by Comic Sanders May 31, 2019
Get the Making Jesus crymug. by JesusLover2028 August 29, 2022
Get the Creepy Jesusmug. person 1: hey have you heard of Jesus Christ the Nazarene
person 2: why of course he's God in the flesh!
person 2: why of course he's God in the flesh!
by IFuckingHateEve December 4, 2023
Get the Jesus Christ the Nazarenemug. When born-again Christians exhibit unusually depraved sexual behavior stemming from their sexual repression.
Rick is all straight laced and likes sports and all that but behind closed doors, he loves getting pegged because he's Jesus Freaky.
by Kung Fu Jimmy December 7, 2023
Get the Jesus Freakymug. When someone pisses you off due to their rude, or otherwise bad behavior, and you begin to lose faith in humanity, that person is testing my Jesus
Can you believe Monica? I babysat her cat, picked her up from the airport, and took her to the mall when her car was dead - but when I need a favor, and I wouldn't really call it a favor if she's my bestie, she disappears like a cockroach when the lights come on. Friends like that be testing my Jesus.
by Siouxsie Supertramp November 20, 2023
Get the testing my Jesusmug.