Computer Minutes

The time it takes for an install/download/etc to complete. The download may state "15 minutes" but in computer minutes it's at least 20 or more, depending on the estimated time.

Corey: Alright, torrenting the whole season now.
Dylan: Awesome, and in only 40 minutes?
Corey: More like 60 computer minutes.
*group sigh*

by TheVurdmeister July 24, 2011

Computer Retarded

A person who cannot do anything involving a computer even if you walk them through a simple task (ie sending an email or installing a game) even if you walk them through it extensively.

Once my friend broke his minecraft trying to install mods. I told him to send me a windows remote assistance email so I can do the complete process in minutes. Took him 4 hours to send me an email containing "C:\users\joel\documents and settings\appdata\.minecraft\bin"

He is a shining example of someone who is computer retarded

by Zaccster December 27, 2011

get off the computer

somthing that people say when you are watching to many lets plays on youtube

Jim get off the computer

by kiki bender April 6, 2017

computer confidence

Someone who thinks he real smooth on the internet. But when he face to face he dont gots it.

I like mac'n on bitches at da club. Some jacob be thinkin he smooth sittin at home wit his computer confidence.

by Steve-o12345 October 20, 2009

computering

the act of being on the computer, doing things on the computer, etc.

friend 1: "hey, what's up?"
friend 2: "just computering.."
friend 1: "oh cool!"

by hell0sarah(1) September 15, 2012

Macintosh Computer

A computer designed for idiots who can't do a simple task such as plug a cable from a device into their computer. People who buy macs think they are releasing themselves of former PC woes(Apple's advertising is built around this), but soon realize that Macs do have problems of their own. Hence the Mac fix it forums website.

Wow, I spent over $3000 on a overpriced piece of shit Macintosh computer and I can't get it to work!

by Macs spelt backward is Scam. January 13, 2009

computer professional

A person whose livelihood is derived from working with computers (either software or hardware).
Someone who is an expert in the field of computer science
A person with an advanced degree in computer science and/or computer engineering

A software engineer working in Microsoft is a computer professional.

by Class Instructor October 30, 2006