john david

a circumcized king with a monstrous cock. john david is the nicest person you will ever meet and though he has an enourmous penis, he has not yet used it and doesn't plan on tapping in to his full potential. john david is loved by all and everyone's friend, only he knows the inner demons that he faces at keeping his massive, veiny, juicy, throbbing dick from taking hold of him and causing him to become a fuck master

Person 1: I love john david! He's such a good friend!
Person 2: yeah, he really is! I heard he has a great cock too!

by doodoomaster69 December 10, 2021

John-boat

Slang word for "penis" popular in Ukraine with Americans.

Look at Marcus! Just walking down the street with his John-boat hangin' out.

by Southern Belle 09 April 2, 2009

John Emmet

he’s short, wears vans, probably has adhd or add, and has a high pitched chipmunk voice.

he’s hella short! oh wait, he’s a john emmet

by bry2022 February 21, 2020

Steamy John

The act of getting head while taking a shit.

I was on the toilet when my girl friend started to give me a "Steamy John"

by I 4M TH3 M4N June 10, 2010

The John Cena

When having sex with a woman, you pull out and stick it in her ass, hook her ankle and pull it up to her waist, then chokehold her while shouting "SUBMIT!" while she screams.

(If she taps out you then run around the room making crowd noises and imitating John Cena's theme song)

I'm so sorry John Cena.
I know I'm going to hell.

I gave her the John Cena Signature STFU!

by Johnny Blaze -v- January 20, 2016

Jordan John

If you are a Jordan John, that means that you are a little Asian grandchild immigrant who braids armpit hair for a living. You have an intense OBSESSION towards all other races and you eat rabbit or deer meat only. Your favorite movie is How the Grinch Stole Christmas because you look like the Grinch. You are also incredibly overweight.

She is such a Jordan John. She needs to eat some veggies.

by truthteller34534343 April 8, 2019

Lumber John

A fancy woodsman with a PhD in Jacking Lumber.

Wow, that Lumber John is exquisitely dressed. What a professional.

by GeezLouise23 September 4, 2011