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Canaan syndrome

Canaan; a guy who has zero life, spends all day playing clash royale, and has zero girls.
by Adolf Hitler's aenpai April 29, 2022
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canaan

a toppest G with the biggest dick and is the muscliest guy you will ever see and is cooler than andrew tate
that guy canaan is a top G
by coolguy322 October 4, 2022
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Related Words
Cagaa Canaan Çağatay cagapalo Çağdaş cagar çağlar cagatay caggage cagla

cagayn

To be a stupid ginger boomer who can’t operate simple electronics
This stupid cagayn ant find the buttons on his tv
by Juss April 30, 2023
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Cagwa

Citizens against government waste and abuse, it's the name of a future political PAC
Why am I not part of cagwa?
by Sexydimma November 15, 2024
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Cagtard

Cagtard is a term used to describe a person (usually in Roblox mil-sim RPing communities) that is way too obsessed with military accuracy and are a general annoyance to every fucking person.
Nerd: UHMMM AKSHUALLY THAT IS THE WRONG HELMET, THE USA SPECIAL FORCES DONT USE THAT!!!!
Normal person: What a fucking cagtard.
by pleasedonotthe June 25, 2024
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Cagato in gola

"Getting shitted in the throat"

To suffer an umiliation even if the motivations are not adequate.
It can be interpreted as "getting owned" but without true motivations.
Often used with the typical gesture of the hand over the mouth.

Similar terminology: "Suca" or "Sto cazzo"
The barista asks for a cash payment, and you answer: "No i only pay with card... cagato in gola!!!"

"The professor gave me a bad mark... mi ha cagato in gola"
by Cyymon July 7, 2024
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Canaanite Flicker Gooning

The sacred art of flicking one's penis or clitoris between strokes or rubs, altering between flicks and rubs. This achieves a rhythm so divine that it promises a state of unparalleled pleasure. The term draws inspiration from the biblical promise of the land of Canaan to Abraham—a covenant of fulfillment and maximum goon pleasure and volume.

In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.

Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.

Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
USAGE 1:

Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!

James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?

USAGE 2:

Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.

Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.

Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
by 000Six_Six000 December 10, 2024
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