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Killed Two Birds With One Apple

Similar to the phrase "kill two birds with one stone" this term means to complete two discrete tasks with a single action. The term traces its origins to a practice, originally made popular by aspiring major league baseball players on the Gulf coast of Florida, of hurling apples at the apparently limitless number of pesky seagulls.
As Mariah's girlfriend walked in on him banging her mother, Mariah thought to himself, "I've just killed two birds with one apple"; I've both fulfilled my MILF fantasy and ended this shitty relationship.
by MGDRehab March 11, 2011
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Two minutes before the end of the day

It is an expression that takes the edge off of the overused phrase, "At the end of the day."

Utilize those last two minutes of your day to relax, and say goodnight to loved ones.
Two minutes before the end of the day the outcome of today's super important business meeting will be exactly what it was when the meeting ended, as well as exactly the same at the actual end of the day.
by Cyprus Denton Fekks March 30, 2011
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Happier than a dog with two dicks

One really-really happy person.

Most male dogs are happy to be able to lick their own dick. Imagine how happy the dog would be with two dicks and be able to lick them both! Man, he's a happy guy.
That sonuvabitch must have just humpped the neighbor's cat. Look at the silly fucker, he's happier than a dog with two dicks.
by Bubba Bill January 8, 2010
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two fries short of a happy meal

A little slow on the uptake. One who is almost smart but yet, not quite.
Crazy or stupid.
One who takes a great nation and deep sixes it into oblivion.
The current president George W. is two fries short of a happy meal! Seriously!!
by Sandi68 April 28, 2006
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kill two pigs with one bird

To accomplish two tasks with one action; an update of the phrase "kill two birds with one stone" via Angry Birds
Guy: Hon, I've got to go out to the post office.
Girl: While you're at it can you pick up the dry cleaning too ... kill two pigs with one bird?
by birdbomber January 26, 2011
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Two can Van Damme

It is the act of kicking the shit out of 10 vietmanese bar patrons while doing a gay split after a couple of drinks.
"Mikey?" "What did I just do?" "Dude, you totally two can Van Dammed those sumbitches!"
by jgf September 30, 2006
mugGet the Two can Van Dammemug.

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