Jewish Rollcall

The act of checking how much money you have left in your wallet the day after a big night/day/weekends drinking.

My head cains mate, fancy going to the redbeck for a breakfast special? ===== Hold on mate, need to have a Jewish Rollcall first, might have to stop at the cashpoint

by BigJayDub May 27, 2010

Jewish Power Play

A move by a greedy person or corporation or higher entity to rip you or a consumer off by making them buy or pay an extortionate fee for some bullshit that they didn't want or agreed to sign up for.

1. Joe: Hey Bob did you hear that Bank of America will soon be charging you a monthly fee for having a checkings account?

Bob: Yeah i heard that too on Yahoo, you would think that those cheap bastards would be in fine shape with having just laid off 30,000 workers but i guess the CEO still isn't satisfied with his all time high personal benefits...

Joe: Yeah that is such a Jewish Power Play from those greedy bastards.

by MacGregor9310 September 30, 2011

Sexually transmitted Jewish Guilt

Also known as STJG, this occurs when Jewish guilt is transferred through a sexual act. Usually from the female partner to the male.

Doctor: "Matt, the results have come back positive. You have sexually transmitted Jewish guilt. Also known as STJG. Have you had relations with any Jewish mothers recently? "

Matt: "Damn you Robertaaaa!!!!"

by Mattybizzle September 29, 2013

Jewish Jeopardy

The banter/dropping of names between two Jews of finding out who knows who

"Do you know Irving, Miriams husband that lives in Florida? "
"Ahh doesn't he have a brother that lives in an apartment above Gristedes between west 62nd and 63rd?"
"Oye I know that schmuck very vell"
"Then you must know my brother Izzy then?"

by Uncle Tom March 22, 2005

Jewish lapdance

Greedily putting an object in your pants and rubbing it vigorously on your bare pubic area, so nobody else will want it.

I gave the TV remote a Jewish Lapdance so I could be couch commando.

by The Real Slutfarm November 6, 2009

Jewish Pudding Cup

When a person lies on their back while naked and put the legs over their head. (This must be prepared a few hours before hand due to the fact that a butt plug is necessary to expand the anus.) The person then removes the butt plug and wait for their sexual partner(s). (Also a must: The partner on the delivering end must have a bad case of diarrhea.) The person on the delivering end then proceeds to 'take a shit' in the receivers anus, the delivering party the sits down, with a spoon and consumes the 'pudding' from the receivers anus. (This must all occur inside of an active gas chamber, because if you are down to do this shit, you need to be killed anyways.)

Cameron wanted to try something a bit more kinky then the usual, so he asked Andrew if he would like to partake in the sexual act of "The Jewish Pudding Cup."

by PyvT June 15, 2014

Black Jewish drinking day

Another drinking holiday invented by the Tonight Show.
Todd Leven brought it to Conan's attention that there was no drinking holiday for jews. As it turns out, Todd didn't drink, so he gave their drinking holiday to the black folk.
Thus, Black Jewish drinking day was born.

October 12th is Black Jewish drinking day.

by Giovanni Mann October 13, 2009