Beard

A condition that causes hair to grow from the chin and lower face. Symptoms include itching, divinity and gratuitous awesomeness.

Synonyms include: Jesus.
Oh Lord! Bless us and our kin with thy Beard and help our facial hair achieve but a portion of thine Beardly glory.
by Brahmes Christus April 10, 2011
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beard

A common word used to address a homosexual's female friend who he takes around town; he normally calls this companion his "girlfriend" to prove to the world that he is a masculine, football watching, titty grabbing heterosexual male. Although, he may think that this so called 'image' is working, he's actually fooling himself. It's completely obvious to on-lookers that he is a flamboyant homo. Gayer than a chihuahua in pink shades.

Here are some warning signs that you may be a beard...

1. He wears more makeup than you.
2. He looks fucking FIERCE in pictures 'cause he smiles wit' his eyes.
3. Uses bronzer as blush
4. Plucks his own eyebrows and his eyebrows look more groomed than yours.
5. Stands with hands on his hips.
Who the hell does Gayfron think that he is fooling? We all know that Vanessa Hudgens is his beard.

Have you ever watched Sunset Tan? Nick's beard sort of looks like a tranny.
by Sharkie Sharks September 21, 2007
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bearded

Something that is totally awesome, leet, super-cool, ragenomic, or otherwise excellent.
Guy # 1 : Im fockin hungry

Guy #2: Hey, want to go to get some subs?

Guy #1 : That would be totally bearded, bro
by Mike Hackett May 14, 2008
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a beard

A woman who is dating a gay man and who unbeknownst to her is covering for his latent homosexuality.
"Greg doesn't really like Susan, she's just a beard."
by WeezieB April 13, 2006
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Beard

A woman who is being used to hide a man’s true affections for another woman or man.
“Max is so over Celeste, look at him with Jasmine. He’s really into her, isn’t he?”

“You haven’t been paying attention, he’s been watching Celeste all night. Jasmine is just his beard to make it look like he’s over her but it’s so obvious he’s trying to make her jealous.”
by Vasper November 26, 2020
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Bearded

When someone gently touches your vagina, but does not finger you.
"Did he beard you"
"Yes he bearded me!"

"I really want him to beard me!"
by rels1997 August 30, 2012
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bearding

Ignorant non-bearded co-worker: "Dude, seriously - what the hell is wrong with your face?"

Cool hip bearded employee: "I'm bearding this month and would appreciate it if you went and pissed up a rope!"
by Dan Manata January 14, 2008
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