The Croydon steamer

1. Excrete a lovely big soft stool (steamer) into a condom.

2. Place into the freezer (freeze for several hours)

3. Take your now frozen steamer out of the freezer.

4. Get into bed with your hopefully experimental and open minded girlfriend/partner/tramp.

5. Place the frozen steamer into the palm of her hand

6. Make deep and passionate love to her.

7. The aim is to make her have three orgasms before the steamer defrosts and returns to its natural soft state.

The Croydon steamer; To Steam ones croydon, steamathon, steamaholic, steam trek, saving private croydon, living the steam, keep it croydon, steamformers, the ultimate steamer.

by tobyornot August 12, 2009

The Philadelphia Steamer

Often confused with the Cleveland Steamer... In the city of brotherly love, this occurs when a guy takes a dump on a girl's chest or vice versa and then mixes the bowel with creme cheese. A variation called the "Philly Steamer" results when the dump is mixed with nacho cheese, onions, and green peppers.

Bob: Spicy mustard you are hot tonight.
Gloria: Oh Bob I can't take anymore. I've
got to go #2.
Bob: Don't worry baby, you can use my
chest.
(After she does her business)
Bob: Oh yeah I love that! Now mix in some
of that Philly Creme Cheese.

by Miller August 7, 2005

the cleavland steamer

When a man or woman takes a shit on their partner's body during sex.

Girl: Can I give you the cleavland steamer on your face?

by Dreadedstar September 6, 2016

The Eldorado Steamer

A technique so complex, disgusting, and sexy at the same time that it has been forbidden. Rumors say that it involves Chipotle, laxatives, sheet music, saran wrap, and gold leaf.

I gave her The Eldorado Steamer last night. It was the most beautiful and disturbing thing I've ever done.

by TastefullCopyrightInfringement May 11, 2015

The Valyrian Steeler

When you want to have sex with your girl but she is on the rag so she lets you put it in her ass. While pounding away you want to punish her for her womanly sin so you take out her tampon and wield it like a nice piece of Valyrian steel. After smacking her around a bit she looks like she just escaped a fight with the Hound.

- Damn did you see that girl in the courtyard?
- Yeah she was fucked up, looks like Jon pulled the Valyrian Steeler on her.

by Johnny Mad-Dogg August 16, 2017

the pittsburgh steamer

wen u penetrate so much in anal ur nuts go in too, and they come out all rown and shit, much like the waters around a pittsburgh steamboat

damm bro i got shit on me from that crazy ass pittsburgh steamer!!!!!!

by john john January 3, 2005

the scottish steamer

1 pint heavy whipped cream
2 pint dark lager
1 pint scottish whiskey
3 tablespoons scottish female cum

garth: i'll have two of the scottish steamers!

clark: two? you know that much cream will leave you on the shitter for hours.

by gary andy masty July 16, 2010