Jesus H. Christ 

the name of te guy who made me emo and gave me the gay.

A: Do you know what the 'H.' is Jesus H. Christ means?

A: That's right. It stands for hottie. Jesus Hottie Christ

The following evening, A was beaten up

Jesus H. Christ by urdad.com December 5, 2021

Jesus H. Christ 

A satirical phrase of surprise or angst used instead of Jesus Christ.

Person 1: Jesus H. Christ!

Person 2: ...what does the H stand for?

Person 1: Hussein!

Jesus H. Christ by floridaBoy February 27, 2009

jesus H. christ 

The H. stands for Herald

definition of herald:

1. an official messenger bringing news.

2. a person or thing viewed as a sign that something is about to happen.

jesus H. christ's H stands for Herald

jesus H. christ by sawrce July 11, 2022

Jesus H. Christ 

God.

"I am God."
- Jesus H. Christ

Jesus H. Christ by Andrew Whiteingale W w00t February 26, 2025

Jesus H. Christ on a Bike

The Irish/UK version of Jesus H. Christ in a Chicken Basket, this phrase is used in extreme situations of shock, surprise, annoyance, or disgust. The addition of a well placed f-bomb can, of course, up the ante considerably.

"Liverpool couldn't beat Sheffield United?! Ah, Jesus H. Christ on a Bike!!!"

Helpful chap in bathroom: "I say, it appears that your penis is dripping a rather greenish looking slime."
You: "What?! JESUS H. FUCKING CHRIST ON A BIKE!!"

Jesus H. Christ on a Bike by Gaz Edmunds September 17, 2008

Jesus H. Christ in a Chicken Basket 

Very random display of disgust or surpise. Also used to emphasize a point being made, or to just humor your friends. First uttered by a by a dick football coach from a small town in Kansas.

Jesus H. Christ in a chicken basket!!! That was the shittiest block I've ever seen.
Guess what Chris? I got laid last night! "Well Jesus H. Christ in a chicken basket, it's about time."

Jesus H. Christ in a Chicken Basket by Brian Ball April 25, 2006

jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch 

a term used to describe something shocking, or so dumfounded and stupid.

Staff sergeant: jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch!, carl what the fucking hell have you done?!

specialist Carl: exactly what you told me to do sergeant I burn the shitter.

Staff sergeant: jesus christ, carl do as I mean not as I say!!

jesus h. christ on a tin fucking crutch by Sparttjbkibweq23SsChief June 15, 2017