"There are two types of
people who go bowling: there are the
people that really, really love bowling, and then there are the people that are like 'wouldn't it be hysterical if we went bowling?'"
"Well, we could go bowling...or we could just hang ourselves..."
"Oh, you went bowling? Glad I couldn't make it."
"If you're sweating while you're bowling, you're out of shape. And if you're out of shape and you're bowling, you're probably a professional bowler."
"Here, put on these moist
shoes ten thousand people have worn, and
stick your fingers in these dirty holes. Now you have the flu."
-Jim Gaffigan