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beard

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Since john didn't believe jack, he said beard.
by moesun November 6, 2017
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Part of a phrase that can be applicable to multiple situations, usually referring to a frustrating, bad or unlikely scenario.
Person 1: "Hey dude, you wanna hit the library tomorrow? It'll be fun!"

Person 2: "Oh Beard.."
by GrizzlyAdamsHadABeard March 9, 2011
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A pain in the ass, a ball-ache, a hassle, an inconvenience. An activity or person that, frankly, you just can't be arsed with.
Scenario 1:

Student A: I've got two assignments in for Monday and I haven't started either

Student B: That is such a Beard.

Scenario 2:

Gentleman 1: Yo, Mike, I can't come to the game tonight. My ex wants to come over and go through the divorce papers

Gentleman 2: What a beard....
by Flashback38 July 29, 2011
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-Facial Hair.
-A long time, or a very far distance.
-A large amount of something.
-An exaggerated measurable estimation.

Informal language.
Usually used incorrectly and ridiculously at the wrong time, and too often.

Something tedious and time consuming might waste beards of your energy, or waste beards of your time.

Origin: The amount of time it takes a man to grow a decent beard is not quick, and a decent beard is at least down to the belt buckle.

Other forms:
beard(s)-ed,
beard(s)-ago,
v. beard-ificate(d),
beard-ification,
beard-ification-ism,
beard-ification-ism-ology,
beard(s)-ly,
beard(s)-worth,
-"Man you were in the bathroom for like twelve beards..."

-"Wow, you're really good at skipping stones! That last one went a beard out into the lake."

-"Johnny, did you take the trash out yet!?"
"Yeah mom! I took the trash out like one hundred beards-ago."

-"You ran that beard of a triathlon so fast! You got first place!"

-"Dude wanna go play beards and barbers at the park with Jack, Lizzy, and the gang?"
"Yeah but I can't, my teacher beard-ificated the amount of homework I had by nearly three beards-worth! I won't be done till like beard o'clock in the morning."

-"I just cut down a beards-worth of trees in my backyard, now the squirrels have no place to live."

-"Did you hear? Jackie's grandma died..."
"Oh yeah, I heard about that beards-ago dude..."
"But she only died yesturday..."
"I know."

-"You suck at Halo 2! Go grow a beard, noob!"
by Paulexander June 12, 2010
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A clingy girlfriend who is far too publicly affectionate in order to convince herself and everyone else that her boyfriend likes her equally.
Bare beard, babe.
by gremly June 10, 2011
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A beard is a buddy that you use as a cover for you to see a person of the opposite sex. You tell others you are meeting someone for him, or taking him out to meet someone. This version has been around since Before Kennedy's time.
Fred is my beard, so I can go and meet chicks.They think their for him.
by Torinoluvr May 12, 2008
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One who engages in pedantic, pseudo-intellectual discussion of meaningless and often obscure pop culture that nobody actually cares about. Typically applies to nerdy topics such as video games, comic books, science fiction, and so forth. Refers to the luxurious fat-guy beards grown by internet shutins, a la the Simpsons Comic Book Guy.
Brodie: He's an alien, for Christ sake. His Kyrptonian biological makeup is enhanced by earth's yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. That would kill him.

Me, watching Mallrats: Christ, Kevin Smith is such a fucking beard.
by pacobird August 21, 2008
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