I'm NoT tOuChInG yOu

I thought school shootings were an INCEL thing 🤔 Hmmm.... I mean... That's not what I said. I said it was constantly being demonized and mocked.

Hym "The guy who is literally fucking the female version of me was talking shit so I'm going to outline the chronology of events. You motherfuckers stuck your finger in my face and twirled it around while saying 'I'm NoT tOuChInG yOu! I'm NoT tOuChInG yOuUuUu!' And then I popped you in the mouth by saying 'And I'm not threatening your kids motherfucker. I'm not going to come in here with a stolen shotgun. I'm not raising an army of hammer clowns' and what did you do? You stuck your finger right back in my face. And what would have happened if I had done something other than this? Huh? You would have said 'Well, clearly I played no role in that. I mean, yeah, he said he would do a thing if I didn't stop but I didn't think he would actually do it! It's not my fault I kept doing the thing I was told would get my kids killed!' I mean seriously. If I told you not to eat something because I KNEW IT WOULD KILL YOU and YOU TOLD ME TO GO FUCK MYSELF, WHOSE FAULT WOULD IT BE THAT YOU DIED? YOURS MOTHERFUCKER."

by Hym Iam March 30, 2023

girl: I'm fine

she is not feeling good (mentally and/or physically) and thinks you (S.O.) might tell her "I know you're not baby, what's wrong?" we may not tell you and might get annoyed if you keep asking but we may eventually tell you but we take your caring words to heart and it usually makes us feel better.

(S.O.): Hey, how are you love?
girl: I'm fine wbu
(S.O.): I know you're not baby, what's wrong?
girl: (explains problem)

(S.O.): Hey, how are you love?
girl: I'm fine wbu
(S.O.): I know you're not baby, what's wrong?
girl: You're right but I'm getting through it, thank you
(S.O.): Of course, let me know if you need ANYTHING

by Elle Annie June 01, 2022

i'm gonna salt you

A warning to prepare someone for a tongue lashing, that they'll be crying once you're done with them.

Talk about my mom one more time and I'm gonna salt you.

by PicklesToMe August 10, 2019

I'm in a meeting

phrase A polite or secretive way to inform someone that you are (or about to be) sitting on the toilet, pooping.

"I can't talk right now. I'm in a meeting."

Person 1 knocks on bathroom door.
Person 2: I'm in a meeting right now. I might be a while.

by Lorenzo Zamboni October 25, 2022

The thing I'm called to do

I'll give you 1 million guesses and I guarantee it's the you'd ever want me to do.

Hym "Your self-help bullshit is cancer and if you all killed yourselves today you would be doing everyone you siphoned wealth from would be better off. And true hell is having your kid murdered by a guy everyone around you provoked into killing your kid. Having to look your neighbors in the face for the rest of your life knowing full-well that they could have done otherwise. What do you think the thing I'm called to do would be in this situation? I'll give you 1 million guesses. You only need 1 but you would take all of them before getting it right."

by Hym Iam December 26, 2023

I'm not a cop

Typically used by professional undercover agents, the phrase "I'm not a cop", gives the impression that you are totally not a cop.

The phrase has assisted the force in infiltrating and capturing thousands of high value targets involved in drug and human traffic.

Mostly used as a persuasive tactic or a reassuring statement to mask his identity in sting operations.

Totally not a Cop: "yo wassup', you guys know where I can find some of the good dope" , "I'm not a cop"

Crook 1: *pulls out gun*

Crook 2: *pulls out gun*

Crook 3: *pulls out gun*

Crook 4: *pulls out gun*

Crook 5: *pulls out gun*

Gang leader: *in a totally re assuring voice* "you came to the right place, let me show you around"

by INKREFIED October 01, 2019

i'm at a pool

i love you, let's get married

person 1: yesterday he said 'i'm at a pool'
person 2: thats wild bro, congrats!!

by rickkkk astleyyyy October 30, 2020