Jordan

jordan is a king among men. he’s like the brad pitt of his generation. everyone he meets wants to suck his dick. those that are lucky enough to actually be allowed this privilege almost have a heart attack at the sight of his massive massive gigantic penis. if he deems you worthy of actual real-life sex, you’d better be prepared, because he knows what he’s doing. he’ll fuck your mcfuckin brains out. he’s sexy as hell and could literally get whatever he wanted by seducing whoever he needs to get it from. his eyes are gorgeous and perfect and mesmerizing, his hair always looks perfect even when he thinks it’s a disaster bc he’s oblivious to how attractive he is. he also could be a stripper or a firefighter based solely on appearance and strength. but also he’s smart and clever and curious and has a million incredible ideas all the time and it’s so cool to hear all of them :)) is there anything he could do to be more perfect? definitely not. except maybe kiss his girlfriend (who is the luckiest person in the universe) 10 times more. if you end up with a jordan, make sure you never lose him!!!!

girl #1: holy shit did you see that guy
girl #2: yeah what the FUCK he was sexy as FUCK oooooh i’d let that jordan paint me in marshmallow cream then lick it all off
girl #1: .....
girl #1: you fuckin right, let’s get it
girl #3 (probably named veronica): bitches better back tf off my man, good idea tho

by macaroniiiiiiica October 28, 2018

Jordan Poole Effect

If there is a baddie at a Basketball Game make sure you rack up points to impress her

Did You See That Baddie over there Bro,Make sure you rack up those points to impress that baddie (Jordan Poole Effect)

by WillDog March 4, 2023

Michael Jordan Syndrome

Totally legitimate medical disorder in which a person argues that nothing new will ever compete with an older version. Also known as Star Wars Syndrome.

Julio thinks that Revenge of the Sith doesn't come close to comparing to the original Star Wars movies. Julio has Michael Jordan Syndrome.

by Stephen Ochocinco December 10, 2013

Benn Jordan

Benn Lee Jordan, producing under various aliases (best known as The Flashbulb), is a fantastic American musician. His styling is generally seen as experimental, often making use of fast drum programming and acid-influenced melodies. Born in 1978, he moved from his hometown of Georgia during his childhood to live with his grandparents in Chicago. He would later begin releasing small labels of instrumental music in the United States and Europe, but has since diversified his works, composing for television and film. Jordan has also made a name for himself in advertising, creating trademark jingles for several companies, including Dove, Knowledge, and Verizon. His latest album release, Pale Blue Dot, was the first to be recorded under his real name, and not an alias. Currently, Jordan is represented by Vapor Music Group, an international creative firm in Toronto (Canada), owning and managing their productions in two recording studios in Chicago.

Benn Jordan's "Kirlian Selections" and "Soundtrack to a Vacant Life" albums are arguably among some of his best work.

by unemployedninja September 27, 2009

Jordan River

A river right next Jordan and israel. Not many know this but it is the place where Jesus Christ was baptized. It flows off in to the dead sea.

someone 1: hey have you been to jordan river?
someone2: no, why?
someone 1: its where jesus was baptized. its really nice there.

by mk614 December 23, 2011

Jordan, Minnesota

Small town in rural Minnesota around 45 minutes southwest of Minneapolis. Came to light in the early eighties when several of the town's adults were swept up in a case of satanic child sexual abuse, as well as a song by Noise Rockers Big Black about the above mentioned incidents.

Jordan, Minnesota has a dark history.

by GaaraoftheDamned September 29, 2012

JordAlice

JordAlice is a fictional character off of a video made by a YouTuber named spagoots official. She came to be because a mic was not working. As I write this there is plans to do more with JordAlice in the future.

I love JordAlice!

by Hangreygirl June 14, 2016