Emergency Inch

The act of pulling the extra skin down around the base of your penis to give a woman an extra inch.

My girl asked me to F' her harder so i had to give her the emergency inch

by Ilfigure March 31, 2023

emergency shitstop

It's like an emergency shit, but it happens while your shopping. You'll usually have a cart full of items and the bathrooms are "conveniently" located on the other side of the registers so you have to leave your cart out in the open, hoping no employees take your cart and put your items back.

"I had to take an emergency shitstop at Menards. Parked my cart, "dropped the kids off at the pool", came back and my caRT WAS GONE!!!"

by Northern Hammer July 1, 2023

Emergency Alert System

a public warning system revolving around the fucking scary ass set of 3 tones you hear followed by a completely robotic text to speech voice or an overhyped radio announcer that is usually completely unintelligible or distorted to the point where it sounds like static. also used for presidential addresses during national emergencies.

“that fucking emergency alert system message last night scared me”
“yeah san diego has been getting tons of them recently”
“why”
“the fuck would i know i’m not the one issuing the alerts”

by fuck you ea September 18, 2023

Salsa Emergency

An emergency of the salsa variety. Usually used in the process of preparing salsa con queso while trying to find the perfect balance of salsa and cheese. Whenever there is too little or too much salsa, there's a salsa emergency. To emphasize the urgency of the situation, "Salsa Emergency!" should be shouted whenever a salsa emergency is discovered.

Salsa Emergency!!

I know you're concerned since we're usually the ones in charge of salsa emergencies.

I was preparing the salsa con queso for Cinco de Nacho and we had a salsa emergency.

by The_Hawk August 5, 2009

milk emergency

When you eat a cookie or brownie and suddenly NEED milk to satisfy your taste buds so you stop whatever you are doing and all out sprint to the fridge destroying everything in your path to satisfy the urge in the short window that it lasts.

I stiff armed grandma on the way to the kitchen to get a gulp of milk because I had a milk emergency while eating a brownie in the basement while playing minecraft and jerking off.

by milkman262 December 18, 2013

dick emergency

A condition that certain clients will have, causing them to occasionally disregard their manners when contacting a sex worker in an attempt to schedule a booking. Individuals having a dick emergency will often not pay proper attention to screening instructions, will attempt to schedule same-day even if policies state that's not offered, and will sometimes even lose grasp of basic grammar.

ring ring
sex worker: "Hello?"
client: "What are your rates?!?"
sex worker: "WOW. OK, let's start with your name first?"
client: "I'm Chad... can you accept me for a booking this afternoon?!?"
sex worker: "OK, I can see that someone is having a dick emergency today... but let's not totally forget our manners, shall we?"
client: "Sorry, yes. So may I please inquire as to your rates?"
sex worker: "They're pretty clearly stated on my web site."
client: "Where is that?"
sex worker: "You managed to find my contact info online... I'm confident that you can find this information, as well. Along with my screening process. Thank you."
click

by demergency July 8, 2019

National Emergency

Two very big words.

"I am officially declaring a National Emergency."

by BootyWarrior99 March 13, 2020