Monster Energy

Big man in a can. Drank by 12 year olds who would like to brag to their friends by drinking alcohol but can't get served anywhere and can't get there hands on it any other way and so use Monster Energy as a substitute because it reads "no recommended for children on the can". They hang around and are considered the cool kid because they've got a can of Monster Energy. They brag when they even get served a Monster because in the UK you have to be over 16 by store policy (not law). These kids walk into newsagents who literally couldn't give a toss and "get served" and get seen as the cool kid. They wave it around and all the girls will be fighting over you for sure *wink wink*! Grown adults find this incredible cringeworthy and when the kids grow up they feel incredibly embarrassed about it.

Kid 1: YOU'LL NEVER A GIRLFRIEND!
Kid 2: OH SHUT YOUR MOUTH I'VE GOT MORE CHANGE THAN YOU! I GOT SERVED A MONSTER ENERGY AT THAT NEWSAGENTS THE OTHER DAY THAT SO INCREASES MY CHANCES OF GETTING ONE! THEY'LL ALL WANT ME! I SO OBVIOUSLY LOOK 16.
Kid 1 (Jealous): OH YEAH RIGHT COURSE DID! I COULD GET SERVED A MONSTER ENERGY AT EVERY NEWSAGENT UNLIKE YOU! I LOOK WAY OVER 16!
Kid 2: SHUT UP! NO MONSTER NO GIRLFRIEND SIMPLE AS THAT! YOUR JUST A KID!
Grown Adult (in the background): What utter babies they are!

by LordJenal May 20, 2022

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Get the Monster Energymug.

Loch Ness Monster

When you flush an extra long shit and as it spins down, the tip stands up straight, breaching the the water like the Loch Ness monster head emerging while the body is hidden underwater.

Loch Ness Monster- I took a shit so long that when it spun down the tube the tip popped out above the water looking at me like the lock ness monster.

by #IAM100% February 25, 2019

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