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Turd burglar

Its an old superstition about A sneaky lil midget bandit theif in the night that climbs in your bathroom window and burgles the turd right out the bowl that more than likely are there because you got shit faced and forgot to flush or your dirty lazy kids left the bowl present for the turd bandit. Because the story goes.... Feed the turd burglar once a week and you will never get a stomach. Keep that gut flora happy ... Feed the turd burglars.
"Tiny tim dont flush that shit you know you got to leave that for the turd burglar tonight or you will end up with a belly ache
by Ghostbuster2000 February 8, 2021
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Registered turd

A person who gives unsolicited medical advice to someone who is actually working in the medical field.

Describes a non-registered nurse, unlicensed medical need, who doesn’t realize they look like an ignorant ass.
That registered turd had the nerve to point out my cold sore and tell me to treat it with tooth paste and tape.
by anonymous November 30, 2022
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Pussy Turd

A Common Colloquialism Expressing The Dissatisfaction One may Experience When Having A Baby.

A human baby. Made from the nutrition the mother consumes and developed over a 9 month period (typically)
written usually as Pussy Turd or Pussy-Turd, but can also be expressed as Pturd, the "P" being silent in this instance.
Pussy Turd : "I thought she was just eating a lot but turns out it was another Pussy Turd Baby."
to which one is traditionally expected to reply with Pturds slightly drawing out the word whilst slowly shaking their head. (Usually left to right, but can also be up and down. *Context Depending ) / Did you just call your son a Pussy-Turd?
by Dr.Butthole MD September 15, 2025
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as thick as a Boxing Day turd

A way of describing someone who is thick or stupid.
“She’s as thick as a Boxing Day turd, her!”
by AwesomeGuy898 June 21, 2025
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Internet Turd

Someone or some group of people on the internet with less than 100k subs who thinks their opinions matter, so they make unnecessarily long videos explaining their opinion, to whom nobody will ever hear, or care about.
Person 69: I just saw an internet turd in my pornhub recommendations
Person 70: Why are you on pornhub
by UARDEDNOTBIGSOUPRICE March 29, 2022
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Turd burglar

An individual who has the annoying habit of making a scene outside the stall while you’re trying pop a deuce in order to get you to hurry up. Turd Burglars show up typical when you’re in public bathroom in a busy location and someone very impatient shows up and decides to interrupt your shitting session.
>You: answering nature’s call in a public bathroom like a normal person

> Turd burglar: “ Hurry up mister I need to go, I NEED TO GO!!!” X 50 on loop until you finish pushing your slimy turd
by Thicke Henry Richard September 8, 2020
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Turd Gambling

Two white Honda Civics racing at a red light.
You tryna do some Turd Gambling?
Nah I’m good thank you tho.
by Gavvihn June 3, 2022
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