Turd Muffin

A turd that is shaped like a banana nut muffin.
Hey everybody, come and look at my turd muffin that I just pinched off into the toilet.
by Peck R. Wood March 10, 2017
Get the Turd Muffin mug.

Rogue Turd

Condition where one experiences abdominal pain due to difficulties derived from a hard or immovable turd as the body tries to pass it to the colon.
person1: What's the matter? person2: My stomach hurts and the pain keeps moving. person1: Oh, I see. You've got a rogue turd.
by trampledunderfoot November 30, 2019
Get the Rogue Turd mug.

Turd Lapping

When you enter a bathroom stall while someone else is in the stall next door, finish your turd and leave the stall all before the person next door finishes his/her business.
Richard returned to his desk beaming with pride after turd lapping his coworker in the restroom.
by Thor’sHammer June 13, 2025
Get the Turd Lapping mug.

Turd Burglar

When you need a shit so bad,it needs complete lonesome to let loose the beast, then someone walks in, causing it to be sucked back in like e g g
by WrittenToe79 June 22, 2022
Get the Turd Burglar mug.

Turd Burglar

A person who buys, or tries to steal, something that is in a bad state of repair and thinks they will be able to sell it after a minor amount of shoddy work for much more money.
Man I can't tell you how many turd burglars from craiglist are blowing up my phone asking me if they think the car I am selling for parts can be rebuilt and made road worthy.
by K2xW July 17, 2021
Get the Turd Burglar mug.

Turd Burglar

One who takes shit or allows themself to be spoken down to by others.
“Poor Jeff, he always allows his boss to talk down to him, poor turd burglar
by Sir Francis Argaf June 09, 2022
Get the Turd Burglar mug.

Turd Burglar

A person who anally fists another, grabbing the feces inside the anal cavity. The fister then removes the contents of the anus and proceeds to Waluigi-run away from the crime scene (usually while also maniacally laughing). This is a very real and lucrative crime. On average a turd burglary occurs at least once every hour.
911 Operator: “911, what’s your emergency?”
Victim: “I need to report a burglary.”
911 Operator: “what was stolen.”
Victim: “I’d prefer not to say. Please send an officer quick! The turd burglar is getting away!”
Get the Turd Burglar mug.