evil witness

1. its an experience under the influence of marijuana, when one stares listlessly for some period of time

2. starring absently for a long period of time

1. e.g. I had intensions of paying attention in class but began evil witnessing at the start of the lecture. e.g. tv is on the food network but you are not actually watching or listening to what is on.

by Stonner Life November 20, 2009

beef witted

A stupid person. Mentally challenged.

Due to some stupid beef witted person, the children's nativity has been cancelled this year.

by Toptonychick September 4, 2021

Slow-witted

Your brain moves slow mentally

2person- how do you spell slow-witted

person- how do you not know how to spell slow witted but just searched i it up. I swear you slow witted

2person- what does slow-witted mean???

by unknown person from new jersey November 1, 2017

Silent Witness

Name given to a gentlmans hand that is used in the act of self love. The hand knows your secrets but luckily for you it will never tell.

That was lucky. I almost broke a finger on my Silent Witness...

by Piggonshig April 24, 2016

E-wit

The art of thinking about what to post online for 2-3 days with the appearance of coming off as being witty, when you are actually a douche that can't come up with something smart on the fly.

"Nicole's Facebook post was awesome!!"

"Nah--that was just a case of E-wit---that bitch ain't that clever."

by Imadouche October 21, 2009

Ahotv's Witnesses

a cult designed to worship organizational skills and overall neatness; our deity is Ahotv and cult members also refer to each other as Ahotv

1: Hey can you help me organize my room?
2: Go call Ahotv's Witnesses for that.
1: Ahotv, can you help organize my room?
2: I'd love to!

by originalAhotv'sWitness September 17, 2017

computer witness

A particular subgenre of computer geek. Someone who is obsessed with computers for the sake of computers and not for what they can do. Will often spend hours running performance tests and having "races" between different chips with various programs without ever getting any actual work done on said equipment.

Gene longs for the good old days of the Macs-vs-PCs war...those were some good times, up late with a flat of Mountain Dew and all his buddies racing their computers. Gene is a computer witness.

by DJ HORSERACING ACCIDENTS September 1, 2004