A guy who seems perfect to date at first until you get to know him and find out he's a complete freak.
by owlerrr September 14, 2010
Blogging while Intoxicated
I wish he'd quit tomming--all of these blog posts he writes while drunk are rambling rants of nonsense.
by thehandrew March 19, 2008
Tom-Tom-Longhammer is a slang term that denotes a man who is slightly cross-eyed, with pigeon feet and tall in stature (over 6ft 3in), yet, between his legs hangs an enormous penis, called a Longhammer. The prefix of this compound word originates from the idea that if said person was a Native American, his tribal name would be Tom-Tom. It is not unusual for a Tom-Tom-Longhammer to be exceptionally well endowed--often resembling a deformed cucumber whose nutrient source during gestational timeframes was a synthesized form of growth hormone that is currently banned in most countries except North Korea where it is used for artificial excess growth in vegetable production. This uniquely sized penis is also used a counter weight that swings to and fro, like a pendulum, neutralizing the opposing motion created by the large anatomically incorrect pigeon feet. It has been said that a Tom-Tom-Longhammer is the most loyal person you will ever meet. He is generous and kind, albeit awkward in nearly all social settings due to his enormous wanker. When a Tom-Tom-Longhammer gets angry, he immediately and instinctively takes off all of his cloths and begins to violently masturbate while going completely crosseyed. It is best to maintain a safe distance from a Tom-Tom-Longhammer when he feels threatened.
Damn, bro, look at that big pigeon looking motherfucker, I bet that homie is a fucking Tom-Tom-Longhammer!
by MalibuRecon April 04, 2018
A pale skinned fagget that no one likes. He hangs out with people, but they all secretly hate him. His head is abnormally small compared to his broad shouldered body. Oh man tom is just the equivalent of retarded.
" Who's that pale skinned fucker over there"
"Oh that's just Tom"
" Is he dying?"
" No he's just that pale"
"Oh that's just Tom"
" Is he dying?"
" No he's just that pale"
by TOMISABIGJERKOFFSHIT May 05, 2009
The sexiest boy on the planet, who knows how to make a girl feel amazing and very loved
Everyone needs a Tom in their life <3
Everyone needs a Tom in their life <3
by Lozzieee February 13, 2012
The creator of MySpace, once a computer game hacker when he was 14 years old, who will one day brainwash the innocent minds of teens all over the world.
by Nobue March 17, 2009
the act of assembling a team of african american transvestites and attaching each of their wee wee's to a beer bong then collecting the multi colored urine and leaving it to ferment, 39 years later you will have a nice wax candle to feed your grandchildren
fuck those swinging tom tom's
by the swedish penis August 12, 2009