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horizontal

horizontal is the word to describe an abnormally large chuguses that not only is taller horizontally than vertically but also makes you gag when you walk past them. They take up the whole sidewalk you want to feel bad for this horizontal lard but there six big Macs fourteen mcflurrys and shitty attitude make that hard
person one: Ahhhhh! is that an earthquake?!
person two: No, it's just Derek walking to taco bell he's such a fucking horizontal chungus.
by syndrome3453 February 3, 2025
mugGet the horizontalmug.

horizontal closet

when clothes are piled on the floor, instead of being put away in a closet or drawer.
Mr. V says that his son has a VERY large horizontal closet.
by Julio Sizzle October 9, 2008
mugGet the horizontal closetmug.

horizontalitis

N. - the inclination to fill up (‘inflame’) any flat, open surface; ‘clutterize’, or, the desire to lay down no matter the circumstances.
Afflicted with horizontalitis, she was headed for an appearance on Hoarders, as she could not keep any area of her home free of clutter.

He suffered from horizontalitis and took the phrase “laying down on the job” to a whole new level.
by CramApple1999 March 29, 2023
mugGet the horizontalitismug.

horizontal handshake

A.k.a. "moocher's greeting" or "glad-handout"; it refers to where one of your "friends" beamingly approaches you with extended arm as if to greet you with a hearty palm-clasp, but instead of positioning his hand vertically the way one usually does when shaking hands, he holds his outstretched palm **upwards** so that his hand is horizontal --- this "gimme, gimme, gimme" position is how his hand is usually held whenever he is around fellow humans (duh!).
I always feel suspicious whenever someone greets me with a horizontal handshake, since it is a good indication that he is planning to ask me for a handout.
by QuacksO August 2, 2019
mugGet the horizontal handshakemug.

Horizontal Shortbus

When both parties are making retarded faces at one another, while simultaneously having sex in the missionary position.
Bae, Horizontal Shortbus and chill?

My boyfriend only ever wants to do the horizontal shortbus with me.
by Desi Dukes July 9, 2017
mugGet the Horizontal Shortbusmug.

the horizontal poker

Mean , Sex . Good , dirty, hot , wild sex! lol
Karita why was you over bobby's house ? , did y'all you know?

No , Rick we didn't do the horizontal poker !
by Wizdee May 10, 2011
mugGet the the horizontal pokermug.

horizontal barracuda

a saying that refers to sex.
You don't make an omelette for someone who stayed over and did not do the horizontal barracuda!
by Poly-anna May 24, 2018
mugGet the horizontal barracudamug.

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