purple sorrow

The sadness Minnesota Vikings fans have for their team pretty much ever year they are in the playoffs and never get to the Superbowl.

Again, this year, there is much purple sorrow among Vikings’ fans as the team did not advance past the first round of the playoffs.

by Purplenado March 4, 2023

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Purple Alert

A British guy having a huge d*ck

Elizabeth: What's wrong with Jame's pants.
Susan: You don't know, that's an purple alert.

by Jackthebriton September 16, 2023

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A cheerful non sequitur and glorious escape hatch from awkward, controversial, or brain-melting conversations. When someone exclaims, “I found a purple rock!”, they are essentially waving a shiny distraction to derail a discussion that has taken an uncomfortable, heated, or overly complicated turn. It is the verbal equivalent of changing the subject faster than you can say tax policy or crypto investing.

Use it when the conversation drifts toward politics, religion, sex, or any other topic that makes you wish you were home talking to your cat. The beauty of it? Nobody can argue with a purple rock.

Author’s Note:
Inspired by years of dodging family dinner debates and surviving small talk with strangers. Because sometimes, the only way out of a bad conversation is geological.

Example:
A: “So, how do you really feel about the election results?”
B: “I found a purple rock!”
A: “…Cool! Where?”

Example:
A: “So how’s your love life going?”
B: “I found a purple rock!”

by Thejocdoc November 7, 2025

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