a nigel danger wank
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
Share definition
Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.
by mrs tosser October 7, 2025
Get the a nigel danger wank.....mug. What did you do this weekend?
I had a wank in church.
Ok...
Yeah, the priest wasn't too happy but he saw a choir boy and did the same.
I had a wank in church.
Ok...
Yeah, the priest wasn't too happy but he saw a choir boy and did the same.
by Baconwound August 9, 2022
Get the wank in churchmug. It is a place where people go to pleasure themselves (wank). It is a location that depends on one's preference, for example for some it could be the shower, bathroom, etc.
Yo, Vlad, where have you been?
I was taking a shower!
Really?
Aight, to be honest I was at the Wank Station!
Wow, you are such a shower wanker, man!
I was taking a shower!
Really?
Aight, to be honest I was at the Wank Station!
Wow, you are such a shower wanker, man!
by wanking May 11, 2017
Get the Wank Stationmug. A debilitating pain or twinge in the neck and shoulders, resulting from excessive or violent masturbation. Usually the affliction of men in their mid-to-late-twenties, directly resulting from a 'dry-spell'.
Most mornings he woke up with wank-neck.
If he doesn't stop, he'll give himself chronic wank-neck.
Wank-neck is the disease of the under sexed.
If he doesn't stop, he'll give himself chronic wank-neck.
Wank-neck is the disease of the under sexed.
by one of many concerned friends January 27, 2014
Get the wank-neckmug. by Shaggy_Magic December 3, 2018
Get the one night wankmug. on the 10th october every year it’s the time where u hunt down the nice photos ur ex sent you and have a great time to them and maybe even text her
by hwggg October 9, 2025
Get the national wank over ex daymug. The insertion of your finger or object into your rectum whilst masturbating / jerking off, to increase pleasure while watching pornography or sexually stimulating broadcast material to enhance the experience, either on television or vvia internet streaming on computer, smartphone or tablet.
He was so aroused by the two lesbians performing cullingus on each other on late-night television, he couldn't resist giving himself a big telly pokey bum wank.
by Mackem Beefy September 19, 2021
Get the big telly pokey bum wankmug.