new mattress effect

When that new mattress feels like a cloud and you want to sleep all the time.

Origin: In Malcolm in the Middle (Season 7, 146-17), Malcolm and Dewey find a new mattress. Malcolm proceeds to sleep infinitely on the mattress, thus, Malcolm experiences the new mattress effect.

Bob: When I got my new mattress I put myself on mandatory bed rest to enjoy the supremacy over my old one.

Joe: That's the new mattress effect, I've had it too.

Tim: I've slept for three days on my new mattress, I can't tell if it's draining my soul or helping it.

Bob: I'm going through the same thing, it's the new mattress effect.

by Allen75 June 16, 2010

Band Mattress

A person in a band who has slept with a majority of the other members in said band.

Wow, Holly's had sex with everybody in her band.

Well, they don't call her the band mattress for nothin.

by OsamaBinRocken December 22, 2010

communist matress

A woman shared by everyone sexually.

Example: Veronica is sleeping around with everyone, she is such a communist matress!

by Chinese tits May 31, 2014

Missouri Mattress

The act of lending your mattress to a friend once you have refused to let them sleep in your room.

Boy: Hey I need to borrow your room tonight...
Girl: No way! #blessed
Boy: Don't CB, she could be the one. What about Missouri compromise?
Girl: I guess we can do Missouri mattress. Thank you!

by Missouri Mattress March 1, 2015

Squat Mattress

A man or woman who has no standard and has had sexual intercourse with most of the squatters in their community

Jillwyn is such a squat mattress, I heard she slept with all the guys at every squat just to have a man to keep her safe, so just like a actual squat mattress everyone got their turn, u don't want her scabies

by tampon420 May 17, 2016

Ballsack Mattress

A ballsack so large and loose that you could rest any number of body parts on it.

That shorty rode the dick bicycle the her meat flaps took a nap on the Ballsack Mattress.

Rob: I'm so Tired I could sleep on the Ballsack Mattress.
Tom: dude, that's gay
Rob: so what. It's comfortable as hell.

by fredman6654 September 8, 2016

sweaty mattress

Another word for Pad (product girls use on their periods

omg she was so scared to use a tampon so she only used sweaty mattresses

omg she smelt like she hasn't changed her sweaty mattress

by meg1235 March 27, 2019