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crumpet dodger

A man who avoids women; typically because he is a homosexual.
"Hey Jamie, you massive crumpet dodger"
by Joni-K July 6, 2016
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Sticky Crumpet

When a girl does her hair up in Princess Leia buns and she fellates you and a friend until you both jizz on the buns.
Me and Michael gave my girl a sticky crumpet the other evening.
by Bigjoe22?? December 30, 2021
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Crumpet

The art of falling asleep when you have a obligation, like to do a destiny 2 raid or schoolwork
Hey man I totally just pulled a crumpet in my statistics class
by liTTLEMAN545 November 21, 2019
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Crumpet Bumper

A person who prefers to engage in sexual activities with an older woman
"Cory really seems to be into older women"
"Ya, he's a real crumpet bumper"
by AnAverageNormalEveryDayGuy March 20, 2024
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Crumpet

Word to describe/classify your stereotypical British fucks, who are incredibly annoying, narcissistic, and like to kiss ass. They're the type of people to eat incredibly flavorless food like un-buttered stale crumpets or scones that just tastes like flour, living up to the stereotype that white people have flavorless food. They also use incredibly annoying vocabulary and like to pick on other people a lot. A disgrace to the entire British nation.
Example:

A: Hey did hear what Elizabeth said in class?
B: I know she's such a fucking scone.

Or..

A: THIS FUCKING CRUMPET KEEPS TRYING TO GET ME INTO TROUBLE
B: I have a fair share of scones in my class too don't worry about it...
by greasy krispey and sexy May 24, 2018
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crumpet burner

Someone who makes it their main purpose to ruin the fun for everyone else.
Look at that crumpet burner pop that kids balloon
by Toshir0z January 12, 2015
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penis crumpet

Penis Crumpet:
When one ejaculates from their erect penis so hard, it shrivels and flattens. This will only occur when overstimulation takes place, after many orgasms.
“I came so hard, now I have a penis crumpet
“Maybe you should go to a doctor, Jim.”
by Dr. Digbick September 29, 2018
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