Story City Iowa

A town in central Iowa with a population of about 3500. Surrounded by 500 miles of corn in all directions, located right on highway 35. Home to some of the most condescending asshole hillbillies you'll ever meet. Some of the attractions of this town include Kum and Go, The Carousel(which is only interesting to Chinese tourist), and the two parks located in the middle of town. The only reason anyone ever comes to this town is to stop and eat at one of the many poorly managed restaurant along the interstate. Living here is atrocious, and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone with a steady income and a good head on their shoulders. The people there are weird, deranged, and want nothing to do with outsiders. The cops are absolute assholes, and the school system is an utter joke. And living there, even for a short period of time, will bore you to death. The only thing to do in Story City is to be a drunken, drug addicted hick. I would recommend avoiding this town, or any town north of Ames along interstate 35, until at least Albert Lea, Minn.
Tourist: So what do people from Story City Iowa do?
Story City Resident: Umm, not much, I've pretty much been sitting in my apartment smoking Crystal Meth for the past 10 years. So, that's about all there is to do here.
by ChicagoTribune May 06, 2013
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Haverhill, Iowa

A very small Iowa town that sucks the souls from those who habitate there. Quite possibly the gateway to Hell. Also known as, "Haverhell".
"I lived in Haverhill, Iowa for a few years and surprisingly made it out alive... My heart is still beating, but most of my soul was destroyed by Haverhell".
by sYDNEYb June 19, 2017
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Tipton, Iowa

Stay away from Tipton, Iowa it is like Hell.
by Meow Bitch December 11, 2019
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Iowa City firehose

When a man is soooo drunk that he passes out naked on his back and eventually starts to piss, straight up in the air, spraying EVERYTHING in sight.
Guy: Bro, you wont believe it, this total slut took me home last night.
Friend: Noice! Do tell.
Guy: Well, I blacked out and came to with her screaming that I had let the "Iowa City firehose" loose on her.

Friend: Ha! Dooshkabob.
by Dictocracker April 05, 2018
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Postville Iowa

A Joint rolled with the thickness of a cigar. Must contain at least 4 filters, 2 papers, and 3 different strains.
Hey Ian, you should come over to my place this weekend so we can smoke this Postville Iowa!
by Sman927 August 08, 2024
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Iowa Crunch Bar

A doodie filled with corn usually enjoyed as an evening treat with a side serving of Sprite.
Brad: Hey man do you want to get a candy bar
Kevin: No way man I just want an Iowa Crunch Bar
by Floofypenguin March 13, 2020
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Iowa City Splash Pad

When a woman squirts so hard that it bounces of their partner’s abdomen and splashes back at them.
I would’ve brought a beach towel if I had known she was gonna pull off that Iowa City Splash Pad.
by PeterPancake December 06, 2023
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