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Taylaaring yourself

Finding yourself in a compromising position when your "partner" walks in on you on the couch watching Saturday Kitchen, whilst self-fornicating and trying to reach completion with vigorous and precise nipple-play. It's made worse by your chode-like body, stained rolex watch and the faint-yet-distinctive smell of beer, sweat and anguish.
Example 1:

Jimmy: "Oh no bro, I heard your girlfriend just walked in on you Taylaaring yourself"

Matthew: "Yeah she did, it was awful. I spilt cans of home brewed beer everywhere. I just want to cry into my slow cooked, pulled pork dinner".

Jimmy: "I bet that wasn't pretty"

Matthew: "It wasn't, but the dinner was good. It was in the cooker for 1700 hours.

Example 2:

Tim: "I would eat that slow cooked, pulled-pork Joe, I heard he Taylaared himself all over it".
by Sirbantsalot December 9, 2012
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Pissing yourself

To completely embarass yourself by making stupid mistakes which you shouldn't be doing in the first place.
Mike: What happened!?

John: I accidentally gave the ball away to the opponent,sorry for that

Mike: Come on! Stop pissing yourself!
by PRESTONSSETTLEMENT March 20, 2021
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flying on yourself

Acting overly self-assertive or self-confident.
Julia: "Hey Daniel i'm so good at reading people!"
Daniel: "Jeeeeessss Julia, stop flying on yourself!"
by zautner August 29, 2012
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Spunked Yourself

From the word spunk - Which means to cum; Spunked Yourself means to cum all over yourself
You know josh wanked all night, He spunked himself 5 times in a row.
So basically you didn't get a handjob, you just Spunked Yourself
by BTEC Roadman January 12, 2020
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Shatting yourself

When you shit so much in the toilet the poop touches your ass
Don’t you love shatting yourself, it feels so good man.
by Bigtiddy69 April 29, 2021
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beside yourself

Popular phrase black parents say to kids as a forewarning
by KinderV September 3, 2022
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glock yourself

When some cunt is annoying so you tell them to glock themselves because they’re a horrible cunt called josh
How about you fucking glock yourself
by Itslittymyg January 14, 2019
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