Hairy Turtle

I hooked up with this guy who totally had a hairy turtle.
by Turtley December 27, 2021
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turtle wash

verb; to cause pain.
used when you are going to do something bad to someone; funny way to scare someone and have them have no idea what you even mean.. until now
"im gonna turtle wash your ass!"
by L Pea-lunk November 29, 2009
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Funny Turtle

When a man's penis goes from being erect to soft very quickly and continuously so it resembles a turtle sticking its head in and out of its shell continuously.
Girl 1: OMG Tina I put my finger in John's butt last night and he got a Funny Turtle!
Girl 2: He should just make up his mind as to whether or not he likes it.
by YAHDOEHADLWA January 07, 2016
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Dirty Turtling

Verb: pushing a turd in and out of your börthole, for sexual gratification. The unholy perversion of "turtling"
Don't make eye contact with Bella. She's been dirty turtling in the corner for the better part of an hour
by suninnovember January 02, 2024
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flesh turtle

A penis that shrivels up so much that it looks like a turtle hiding in its shell.
It was so cold out that my dick became a flesh turtle.
by FleshTurtle July 16, 2018
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turtled up

When a guy gets so cold, his dick draws up inside himself to the point of looking as though he may be uncut, even though he isn't.
Man, it's so damn cold in here I was turtled up and had to pull my dick out of myself just to take a leak.

I think... but it was so damn long I forget, I have a hangover and I'm gonna need chemo.
by dj_nafi November 26, 2014
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Ninja Turtle

When you shit the bed and fall back asleep leaving the shit to harden and form a sort of shell on your back and ass.
"I love being a turtle" tyler said after discovering that he had pulled a ninja turtle last night
by james lebough July 29, 2019
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