hoover wank

When Gareth gets a new hoover and because he hasn’t got a woman he uses the hoover to pleasure himself

Gareth was getting excited looking at the new hoover as he anticipated a hoover wank later

by Jessdirty April 20, 2021

wank cycles

When you tactically bat one out so that you'll last longer should you be lucky enough to get some action later on.

Josephina: Wow, honey! You lasted much longer than your standard 45 seconds tonight.

Esteban: Yes, dear. I got my wank cycles right today in the hope of having prolonged sexual intercourse with you this evening. Thanks for noticing. Two minutes is a new record.

by Handsome_Cat April 19, 2022

wank wipe

A name of a tissue you use to wipe away your sperm

After I finished masturbating I used a wank wipe to clean up me genital area

by Upstairsdragon December 19, 2013

wank theatrics

The images played out in your "wank bank" as you proceed to knock one out

Imaginative stimulation when there is no pornographic material to hand

( 2 very attractive ladies walk by) .... Those 2 hotties will be lezzing off in my wank theatrics tonight

by Mr blue March 11, 2016

wank mittens

The proper term for noncey boxing gloves.

Look at that ponce lace up his wank mittens.

by Loafingwafu October 17, 2017

Wanking the dog

To waste time doing something unecessary.

Example: Gary got fired for wanking the dog.

by PotsNPan July 16, 2021

The Lifetime Wank Award

When Some Takes Ages To Cum While Masturbating

I heard That Person Over There Took 4Hours to cum while masturvbating last night,
Wow, He Deserves The Lifetime Wank Award

by uuuuhuhuhuhuhuhu June 25, 2010