Adrenaline Wank

A form of ad-hoc masturbation following an unexpected event, causing a sudden rush of adrenaline. Usually performed in public as it should be followed through while you still feel the hormone coursing through your veins.

Guy 1: I think we lost the Feds.
Guy 2: That was madness. I could go for an adrenaline wank right now.

by syzlacker November 13, 2019

Post wank vision

Post-wank vision helps improve your judgement on relationship decisions when your horny. When you take off the ‘wank goggles’ your mind will be clearer, allowing you to assess relationship decisions based on there true attributes (and not just her fine ass).

Eoghan: *thinks to himself* awwwwww fuck that took way too long. Thank god for twins.

Eoghan text: mate, my post wank vision suggests I should keen this chick around.

Andrew M: nice move mate, all big calls should be made with a clear mind.

What time will I meet you for the McGregor fight?

by Some mate1 January 26, 2020

Swedish Crab Wank

When someone is wanking off or getting wanked off by someone else and their foreskin rips off while doing so.

Megan: “I gave him a Swedish Crab Wank”

by RicoIsNonce August 25, 2023

Peterborough wank

A Peterborough wank is when a male jerks off with a condom on which is usually followed with a gap sound

I heard Shay doing a Peterborough wank last night

by Oopie goopie III July 6, 2025

Plank Wank

Where you stay as still as a statue but you have a wank

You wouldn’t believe what I just did. I had a plank wank

by Pete-the-pedo July 24, 2025

Flashbang wank

A flashbang wank is when an individual decides to masturbate or engage in sexual intercourse whilst tackling a throbbing headache before the event. The word ‘flashbang’ comes from the sheer brain fuckery that is experienced after ejaculation. The pain is so awful that you don’t even have time to clean up the bodily fluids due to having a strong urge to hold your head against a pillow to calm the pain.

I had a flashbang wank earlier babe, and it was the most unsatisfactory wank i have ever fucking had. However, it wont stop me from flashbang fucking the shit out of you later.

by Cum shoot January 20, 2021

Trouser wank

When a girl or guy feels up a guys dick through is trousers

“How far have you gone?”
“I gave Jack a trouser wank”

by Penis_nose August 26, 2019