Cum Turd

The phrase “Cum Turd” refers to when you take a dump and feel way better afterwards.

“Dude, I just laid a major cum turd in the guest bathroom. I feel like I just lost ten pounds.”

by 0s0r0 December 6, 2024

turd

Bryce Jacobs

Oh my gawd, he is such a Turd

by pseudonym-Bryce Jacobs July 18, 2017

TURDS, Trump Unrequited Relationship Derangement Syndrome

TURDS—Trump Unrequited Relationship Derangement Syndrome—isn’t just a joke; it’s a mirror held up to the bizarre, one-sided obsession some fans have with Donald Trump.
Including the tagline "he ain’t ever gonna love you back, boo" like in the example, combines political rhetoric with pop culture, referencing the iconic line from Beyoncé's "Single Ladies". This phrase emphasizes the unrequited nature of such devotion, suggesting that while supporters may idolize Trump, his feelings aren't reciprocated.
The derangement angle is where the TURDS start to hit the fan. Imagine being so fixated on someone that you lose sight of reality—whether it’s scrolling endless Twitter threads, crying over canceled rallies, or muttering his name under your breath like a lovesick teenager. It’s not just devotion; it’s obsession, and Trump’s narcissistic nature only fuels the fire. He’s the sun in this messed-up solar system, burning dimly orange but never actually seeing you orbiting around him.
And let’s face it: he ain’t ever gonna love you back, boo. Not really. Not in that way. But hey, at least you’ve got the satisfaction of knowing, with plenty of other TURDS out there, you’re not the only one obsessed.

Me: "TDS? Trump certainly has some sort of derangement syndrome, but you seem to have a bad case of the TURDS: He ain’t ever gonna love you back, boo."

Them: "What's TURDS?"

Me: "TURDS, Trump Unrequited Relationship Derangement Syndrome"

by megaleach February 28, 2025

Sneaky Turd

turds that are disappointingly hard to see because they sneak out of sight below the water

damn I was trying to take a photo of my amazing shit but it turned out to be a sneaky turd

by itakephotosofmyshit January 31, 2021

Turd Shitter

Another Way To Diss Your Friend In A Unmature Way....

Though very stupid, it's quite funny when used out of the blue...makes one look puzzled and stare at you blankly in curiousity of what the hell you just said!

Ya know Joe, You are a no good turd shitter!

Or, Joe you peice of no good turd shitter!

by Chris "The Outlaw" January 7, 2008

Turd of Damocles

This act can only be performed after two days of a high protein diet consisting of eggs, meat and lots of cheese. One straddles the face a willing sexual partner and then slowly dedicates but never allowing the anus to sever the feces in order to delicately suspend a long turd that dangles over the partners face. This act was invented and performed by legendary adult film star, Golden Sterling. He in fact holds the world record for the longest turd and for the longest time the turd was suspended over his also famous partner, Lamarr of Pittsburgh

Did you see that video of Golden Sterling dangling that 18” turd? He dubbed it the Turd of Damocles!

by Golden Sterling April 2, 2025

Turd in the Chili Bowl

(On South Park's first episode of their 14th season) Anyone who doesn't believe that Sex Addiction is a disease, thus ruining the popular belief that Sex Addiction is a virus sent out by an infected Alien Wizard residing in the Independence Hall.

Kyle: What if sex addiction isn't a disease, but a state of mind!
Sex Addiction Counselor: *Picks up phone and secretly says to whoever is on the other line...* We have a Turd in the Chili Bowl. I repeat, we have a Turd in the Chili Bowl!

by theskymightfall March 21, 2010