Big Telly Wank

The act of cranking one out involving the use of the largest screen in the house (usually the TV in the living room) to watch pornography.

I'm sick of squinting at my phone screen in the toilet while the missus is home. I've got the house to myself tonight so I'm going to crack open a can, get pornhub up on the 60" in the living room and have a nice big telly wank.

by sproates April 29, 2021

Protein Wank

When you mix various substances into your semen (doesnt have to be yours). Then drink the sweet nectar you just made.

In the morning i need a pick me up so i make a protein wank

by cosmicgaming September 11, 2016

Dilly Wanked

Long story short... You’re Fucked. Something (or someone) so fucked up, it is beyond repair.

Similar to being fucked over...HARDCORE.
Can be used as both a Noun and/or a Verb
Example( Dilly Wank, Dilly Wanker, Dilly Wanked, Dilly Wanking)

“Dammit Anthony, you’re dilly wanking me!”
“That Seth is a Dilly Wanking Bastard”
After a long day Kris looks to his wife after she asked how his day was “Honey, my day was Dilly Wanked from begging to end”

by GBR3710 February 28, 2019

Cheek wanking

When you pull the skin on your cheeks and let go so it make a weird nose

Person one: stop cheek wanking its weird
Person 2: *does it again*

by Yourdachokedtodeathonmyfatdick April 16, 2020

Bare-Bulb wanking

When a man wanks only with the tip of his dick AKA bare bulb

For bare-bulb wanking to work the dick should be fully erect for the entire time.

by ProfPm_StuSm March 15, 2025

polluted wank

when you are masturbating and in the last seconds before you cum, the wrong thoughts enter your mind

ah man, again just before seconds before I came, David Letterman's face appeared in my thoughts, i can't stand when i get those polluted wanks, you just don't enjoy the orgasm

by MasterBJB May 10, 2018

Wank

The collective noun for a group of cyclists.

I went to the coffee shop, but it was overfilled with a wank of cyclists

by TMarts75 December 29, 2024