turtling

when you go to take a shit but you dont finish and you end up walking around making it hard to walk normally

im sorry ma i cant come downstairs

ma: jimmy are you okay?
no ma why dont you get me some laxitives
ma: youre turtling again arent you
i said no mom im not turtling i just need some laxitives
ma: no your turtling
all i wanted was some laxies just one laxy

by fat nickle berry September 17, 2025

turtle

An amphibian that's lazy as fuck and wears a bulletproof shell on his/her back.Lives its life on land but lays eggs in water.Cold-blooded, heavy bastard that's slower than a man half-dead from work.

Look at that turtle, it's so lazy!

by TheNameIsHedvig April 28, 2014

turtle

A more subtle name for herpes. The name of someone who studies turtles is a herpetologists. Therefore, herpe- in the name relates to a more subtle way to talk about herpes.

Seth: Dude, my condom broke while I was fucking Sarah.
Alex: Bro!! She's got the turtle!!
Seth: Oh Fuck!!

by Bassproman November 2, 2015

national ninja turtle day

the day where we applause ninja turtles

Tom: Hey did you know its national ninja turtle day

by michaelturtless May 7, 2023

scram turtle

a scram and an awkward turtle, in one. the most socially awkward, scrammiest person you can think of.

scram: A punk bitch. A snitch. Someone who is probably going to end up getting fucked up. Someone you don't chill with...ever.

awkward turtle: A word used to discribe the gesture made by your hands after a line or series of lines have been spoken that have now resulted in an uncomfortable silence. A motion performed by stacking one's hands on top of one another, extending the thumbs and rotating the thumbs slowly. Performed after a friend has said/done something awkward, either to ease the tension or further humiliate the friend. And silence ensues

Jordynn stop being a creep, you scram turtle

by j holee September 6, 2009

Turtle Shell On A Monkey Bar

Men who ride Harley's or other cruising type bikes, who wear turtle shell style helmets because they are not driving fast enough to need a full helmet usually. And they ride on a bike that has had custom steering handles installed. The handle bars are usually raised an additional 10 to 12 inches, making the rider appear to be hanging from a monkey bar.

"How bout that turtle shell on a monkey bar, his tiny helmet had huge skulls painted on it and he was barely able to hang onto his monkey bar because it was almost too high..."

by BOSS*bitch June 11, 2015

Sick turtle

Someone who is slow, (Crippled) and gets sick a lot; because they have a weak immune system.

I am a sick turtle

by Sick turtle September 23, 2016