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Sandy Handy

A Handjob at the beach but the hand as sand on it
"My friend got a Sandy handy at the beach yesterday."
"Damn man that's gotta hurt."
by Th517874 July 1, 2019
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Hamburg Handy

When you give someone’s butthole a massage.
She was crazy, we didn’t have sex but she gave me a Hamburg Handy. I knew manning friends with a German girl would pay off!
by J Sixer February 15, 2020
mugGet the Hamburg Handymug.

jam handy

1. The popular 1940's Educational Film Production Company, 'Jam Handy', who created such classic films as "A Case of Spring Fever"
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
"Nigel, where does one acquire a Jam Handy in this borough?"
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
by Adrian Potato September 26, 2020
mugGet the jam handymug.

Red Handy

When a menstruating woman pleasures herself and her dude walks in a catches her and he’s disgusted so to try and make it better she give him a hand job with her bloody hand.
Guy 1: Why is your dick red, I can’t put that in my mouth?
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
by Captain Red Wing June 6, 2018
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Moist Handy

the boys won the grand final and after went to the locker rooms for a round of Moist Handys
by Corayzy November 21, 2022
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Sani Handy

Joe is still recovering from the sani handy he got last night.
by Ihateitwhen July 14, 2021
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Farm Handy

The position in a horse stable that collects prizing winning sperm from a Triple Crown horse.
'That American Pharaoh is going to Farm Handy heaven!'
by Farm Handy December 22, 2015
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