Retinal Clap

An eye infection. Or waking up with a ton of sleep on your eyes.

"Dude what happened to your eye?" asks Nick

"My contacts are killing me!" says Pete

"Have you seen a doctor about your retinal clap?" replies Nick

by Swift_Nick_Cudd June 18, 2011

retaudit

When an audit is fucking retarded.

This audit is fucking retaudit.

by r4ph November 13, 2014

RetirementRoach

Older employees of a company that refuse to retire. RetirementRoaches stay at an organization well beyond their required time and usually end up dying on the job or shortly after finally retiring.

That Betty is a persistent retirementroach. I think she hanging around for the benefits. What does she do again?

by Dyalect March 10, 2015

retirement goatee

The goatee you grow after you finally retire for the rest of your life. Men known to have done this include Jim Leyland and Shaq

Man, I worked in a factory for 40 years. I can't wait to retire and grow out my retirement goatee

by Qui-Gon Jake May 25, 2016

Retired stoner

Someone that no longer smokes pot but still lives the way a stoner would

That dude over there...he's a retired stoner he looks walks talks and acts like one but he hasn't smoked for years

by Guarmine February 16, 2017

retinal sex

when one shoves his massive cock into a girls eye socket, causing it to bleed out as the man fills the girls eye socket with his cum.

Person1: i had retinal sex with her last night, she had to go to the hospital to get it fixed.

by some hackerman June 23, 2018

Retired-programmer syndrome

A syndrome in which the sufferer thinks they're far superior to others in every way for the sole reason that they were once a programmer. Usually also have Real-Programmer Syndrome, usually act like vegans.

A: I was once a programmer, but have since retired. Did I tell you that I'm a retired programmer? Helloo??
B: Nobody. Gives. A. Fuck.
A: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT I USED TO WRITE MILLIONS OF PAGES OF CODE BACK WHEN WE HAD TO WRITE NUMBERS BEFORE OUR LINES TO KEEP TRACK OF- You get it. A classic example of Retired-Programmer Syndrome.

by Steff a knee March 3, 2019