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Religion I can get behind

Do you even hear yourself?
Sam Sedar "Now that's a Religion I can get behind! You know? Where God... Wants the things I want... And values the things I value... Like me and God have the same thoughts and desires... That's a religion I can get behind! And no one should be allowed to have more political power than me either."

Hym "You... You see how that is the exact thing I said about atheist shit-libs who split hairs on religion, right? Like, you want you to be the God.... And that's when you're fine with it. Solipsistic narcissism."

Sam Sedar "Right but if the religion was me it would be good."

Hym "Right, see, THIS is why I just murder God. That exact line of reasoning is exactly why I needs to die."
by Hym Iam January 22, 2025
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How in the fuck did I get home just now?

I'm walking home from work just now, and I walk out the door... Step down the hill onto the side walk... And I zone out COMPLETELY. I don't remember walking across the intersection... I don't remember crossing the train tracks... I don't remember turning the corner... I look up and I can already see my apartment.
Hym "How in the fuck did I get home just now? I can usually recall walking past some of the milestones I use to, like, keep track of my progress but this time... What the fuck happened just there? I just skipped like 80% of my walk. I... Are you trying to kill me? I lost like a full 30 minutes just there. I mean, it was 730 when I started writing this... I pooped and showered... Rubbed one out... The walk home only takes 10 minutes... I'm missing like 30 minutes. What the fuck is happening there? Randy didn't show up today... So THAT was weird... What the fuck is happening there? I mean AS SOON as I stepped on the sidewalk it's like I skipped the next 8 minutes forward in time... And then I'm still missing 22 minutes... Hmmm... Are YOU doing that? Time is all fucked today."
by Hym Iam March 9, 2025
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i might get on one knee or two

they are happy for what you give them and want to give you a blowjob
"babe you can have my hoodie"
"aw babe i might get on one knee or two"
by DaVo691 November 23, 2021
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I'll pay you when I get paid

Something someone says with no intention of paying anyone back.
Mikey: "Alright David, here's your Triple Cheeseburger with Fries and a Coke. That's £12 total."
David: "I'll pay you when I get paid."
by BlueXander May 25, 2023
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