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Jesus Card 

When I say I pulled out the Jesus card: I have just done something almost impossible or something shouldn't have happened. (Got lucky as hell)
I just pulled out a Jesus card.
Jesus Card by Lore_boi October 26, 2020

jesus juarez 

Fat shit who doesn't do there homework and watches tik tok during his class and smells like are pit. And also doesn't brush there teeth
"Did you go to jesus Juarez' house" "yah" "how did you survive" "I just was holding my breath " "dam I got to try that"
jesus juarez by Not skinny kid November 1, 2020

Jesus Jones - Right Here Right Now 

This is one of the stupidest songs I’ve ever heard in my life. Like seriously who. the fuck cares. 1991 sucked ass. The 90s were really degrading. Apart from some of the music but it was a pretty horrible decade.
Whoever wrote “Jesus Jones - Right Here Right Now” should be shot

Jesus Crist

Jesus Crist is a name you would give to a mentally stable young drug lord. They would own a business in Portugal and they would be shipping worldwide.
Person 1: Hey, you're a Jesus Crist.
The apparent Jesus Crist: Yes it is I, Mr Pablo Escobar.
Jesus Crist by Yes i am not gay December 1, 2020

Jesus Crist

The word phrase Jesus Crist would be used to describe a mentally stable drug lord. This drug lord would own a business in Argentina and Portugal and would ship the amazing powders and crystals (drugs) worldwide.
Person 1: Hey, are you Jesus Crist
The apparent Jesus Crist: Yes, it is I Pablo Escobar the one who sells the white stuff.
Jesus Crist by Yes i am not gay December 1, 2020

Jesus Burrito

1. a theoretical burrito that Jesus Christ makes so hot that even he himself cannot eat it (usually said to be microwaved).
2. any burrito that is so hot that it can't be eaten by a mortal human (although Jesus probably could).
3. A burrito that is so hot it makes you see Jesus.
4. Archaic: A burrito that is so hot that it burns the sin right outta ya.
5. Noun: Another name for the Holy Corpse Parts in Jojo's Bizzare Adventure, Specifically Eyes of Heaven, seeing as they look like burritos in the game
"Oh, we got another Jesus Burrito" - Joel
Jesus Burrito by Theawsomudkip December 7, 2020