fartin' around the turd

Fartin' around the turd is a figure of speech used to imply that somebody or something is wasting time or procrastinating.

This figure of speech comes from the actions of a gaseous individual, who instead of going to the bathroom and dropping a deuce, with just sit there and fart around the turd all afternoon.

"Hey Justin, quit fartin' around the turd, these are open-air cubicles and it's starting to smell like raw sewage in here."

"Hey Joe, quit fartin around the turd and do your taxes already."

by Schiftie August 24, 2009

Traumatic Turd Syndrome

(n.) An emotional upset created upon having to plunge a toilet with an ugly, smelly, hairy turd in it. Said to be so upsetting that the person plunging the toilet gags and often becomes nauseated . The worst case scenario is the turd not going down, and withering from the toilet bowl to the floor, where the person with the plunger has to run to avoid a spattering or being bitten.
In most cases immature plungers are said to experience Ophidiophobia, ((fear of snakes)), You may suffer from snake phobia due to a childhood incident or maybe because of societal upbringing. Most people are afraid of turds for it is their belief that the turd ((as it relates to the form of a snake)) is a form of evil and that it can cause complete destruction in life.

Tommy was leaning against the wall , just outside the bathroom entrance with a plunger in his hand, he was shaking and holding his nose. I knew right away that Tommy had the Traumatic Turd Syndrome.

by jeffbo June 23, 2009

Suck My Turd

a quality come back when "get fucked" just won't do

BEN: Hey, I banged your girlfriend last night

TOM: Suck my turd dude

by SceneOne August 22, 2010

turd in your pocket

When someone tries to include you in a "we" that you don't feel part of, the traditional response is "We? What do you mean, we? Do you have a turd in your pocket?" Translates as semi-funny emphatic rejection of false or forced collectivism. (My "do you have a mouse in your pocket?" is the cleaned-up version of the old rhetorical rejection of the false "we.")

#1: We can take care of that.

#2: We? What's this "we" shit? Do you have a turd in your pocket?

by Why da'ya Care November 8, 2007

air droppin' turds

When you take a snap shot of a turd on your iphone, then you air drop it to random people in a crowd.

I was on a plane and I was air droppin' turds!

by dr rocket December 8, 2018

rolled off a turd

A fart that smells so shifty, it must've rolled off a turd before escaping the butthole.

That one smells like it rolled off a turd.

by K-ILL April 7, 2016

frosty turd nuggets

Frosty turd nuggets. When a group of guys are so bad at a sport that they instead play with their own poop and eat it.

My god did you see how bad that team played? They were playing like a bunch of frosty turd nuggets.

Dad do we have to watch these frosty turd nuggets they suck!

by California snafu October 10, 2018