The Beard Theory

If one's beard extends past certain parameters of length and neatness, it's length can represent the magnitude of their emotional barriers.

The Beard Theory was initially rejected by Urban Dictionary editors because they had beards that exceeded the acceptable length. The Beard Theory states that their beards created an emotional barrier between them and the previous submission, therefore allowing them to reject it so willingly.

by By and Large March 19, 2015

The potato theory

Either everything is a potato or nothing is a potato. This theory is very similar to the sex toy theory. Which says that either everything is a sex toy or nothing is a sex toy. This theory is similar to the atom theory. Which says that either everything is atom or nothing is atom.

Person: ey bro u a potato?!
Person 2: maybe bro, maybe ....
Person: shut up mr. the potato theory

by Eliasisnotgay October 18, 2020

replacement theory

You're insightful if you notice it and think it's good.
You're a conspiracy theorist if you notice it and think it's bad.

Tucker Carlson is engaging in debunked conspiracy theories when he peddles the racist "replacement theory." The government is not using waves of immigrants to replace white Americans.

by Clausewitz May 18, 2023

Merman Theory

a theory that a man, no matter how unattractive he may seem at first, he will eventually look beautiful to you if you see him every day all day.

Based on the theory that sailors used to spend months at sea and started to slowly see manatees turn into mermen.

Alexa: omg Cody is kind of a badass.

Anya: Are you nuts?! He's no Khal Drogo or Jason Mamoa. It's probably just Merman Theory. You guys work every shift together at the hospital.

by Childish Bambino October 20, 2018

Mutation theory

Mutation theory states that all albanians are genetically born male and if there’s a female albanian she’s a genetic mutation

Man I met a female alb today... she broke mutation theory

by Serbjon October 22, 2020

the poop theory

The theory of poop bears on the compatibility of 2 people who are together in a relationship, mainly a girlfriend or a boyfriend. two people are meant to be when one always poops out hard and/or stiff shits and the other one poops out soft and/or watery shits. compatibility strengthens when the two people are shitting together or around the same time.

the poop theory is the theory on poop

Girlfriend: Dayum i jus took a hard ass shit
Boyfriend: aaaayyy i’m taking a shit too, it’s soft tho.

by N.S2 February 19, 2023

The soup theory

The theory that eating soup at lunch during school hours will get you cuffed

Everyone who had soup at lunch last week has a boyfriend by this week, the soup theory proved true

by Feminine mine December 9, 2017