Touching Jesus

Getting high, usually by using marijuana. Commonly misunderstood for masturbating.

Yo man I'm touching Jesus right now!
Gross.

Nah, i mean spiritually!
Oh nice bro!

by Derethad June 24, 2010

slim jesus

a complete copy of Eminem (Slim Shady) with only one song that actually went viral a doesn't have any flow and is trash

person 1: hey
person 2: have you heard of the soundcloud rapper
person 1: which one
person 2: i forgot his name, but he is a total slim jesus
person 1: oh god

by swaggerblob November 12, 2017

doing a jesus

when you are failing at something and come back and win

we were losing the game but we came back and it was like doing a jesus!
we were loosing but we did a jesus and won!

by Octosc June 5, 2018

jesus sweat

A term used for a nigga that worships the ground the he himself walks on.

Look at this jesus sweat ass nigga Jared.

by blank space June 18, 2014

Jesus Christ

A lame guy who is against LGBT but at the same time he has strong gay tendencies
He thinks he has no physical father

Because his mother is sadly a prostitute for bad conditions of miserable life

Jesus Christ: Hey i wanna be a messiah who is my father btw
Mary: I dont remember that day probably i am raper by a group but once i was a virgin because i serve anal and oral intercourse to my customers. Where is my birth control pills?

by Butt Hair of Gerald Witcher October 4, 2023

Jesus envy

A nonbeliever who wishes they did believe in Christianity and Jesus Christ. A nonbeliever who appreciates and envies religious people and religious culture.

I'm an atheist, but whenever I walk by a church I get serious Jesus envy.

by Jackson Montana December 13, 2010

Jesus Christ

My nigga

Brian: My crew is big and it keeps getting bigga, that's cause Jesus Christ is my nigga

by grease_of_sandwich February 20, 2020