Pokey bum wank

An act of masturbation where you put your legs over your head and poke yourself in the bum

I was going to have a pokey bum wank today but I'm going to Spencer's house

by Pls1234 February 3, 2017

Shitty Wank Demon

A weird Youtube creature that stalks through Youtube looking for the next victim. May or may not have a virus in the video, but is otherwise harmless.
The video is of a claymation guy pooping and then blowing his load on his feces, and a rabbit humanoid creature pops out and gives him 3 wishes. The guy wishes for a castle and one appears but it's made of poop and cum. Then he asks for a boat and a boat made of poop appears, and then he asks to go home and is teleported to a world made of poop and wank.
Another video has a person (maybe the same dude from the first) doing the same as before but in a toilet, so the shitty wank demon's wife appears and throws poop like a chimp.

Don't go to the Shitty Wank Demon's world, it is made of raw sewage.

by happyatcommonsense March 26, 2019

Isaac Newton Wank

The act of wanking upside down for the objective of giving yourself a facial. The jizz acts like the Apple falling from the tree, gravity takes it course and hits the participant in the cranial area.

I had an Isaac Newton wank last night, glazed myself like a doughnut

by McLoopster August 20, 2018

stank n' wank

When you plop on the porcelain throne and simultaneously shit and masturbate into the same pot. To conserve water? To be efficient? Hell if I know. Intent and order of operations do not matter. If there's fudge and gravy in the bowl, you just had a stank n' wank.

My last bowel movement got me going so I decided to have a stank n' wank instead.

Went to the latrine to pleasure myself, and was there so long I decided to stank n' wank to save myself another trip.

by CreditToStefan December 7, 2016

utter wank stain

The worst sort of cunt. Someone who acts like a dick all the time.

That guy rick is an utter wank stain.

by Sheggles2point0 April 22, 2018

Jaws-Mode Wank

A niche practice where a man will bite off his own penis for sexual gratification while imagining a drunken Robert Shaw singing.

Sky News now apologising for language in Dominic Cummings message accusing Boris Johnson of 'Jaws-mode wank'

by Humphrey the Cat October 31, 2023

Wanked all over

Occurs mainly whilst playing any form of game or even if you feel like it in everyday life

I was playing a game of FIFA and I wanked all over some nit but he got the win

You better fuck off before I wank all over you
I was playing chess and I got that motherfucker in checkmate needless to say he was about to be wanked all over

by torkyj February 3, 2020