Window wank of faith

The act of jerking off outside a window whilst crying as the person commiting the act has come to terms with the fact that they are a pathetic welp of person who looks up vaguely sexual terms on Urban Dictionary to get a hard on, only to quickly be struck with the epiphany that they are wasting the precious life they have been endowed with, and the person you could have been has been burnt into nothingness by your abhorrent choices in life, and you are just the abysmal shell of what could have been a potentially good human being.

my name jeff

also, stop looking up shit like window wank of faith and do something productive for once you cognitively inept mongrel.

by GetPrankedFaggo April 3, 2017

Houdini bag wank

When one places themselves in a hold-all, zips it up and secures with a padlock. Once secured in the bag, you wank yourself into oblivion and finally try to escape.

Sorry I’m late for work boss, I decided to try a Houdini bag wank this morning.

by Jim’ll fist it February 11, 2023

yank my wank

To masturbate

1. You almost done?
2. Yeah, but first i gotta yank my wank

by Golf swinger on the daily December 15, 2016

utter wank stain

The worst sort of cunt. Someone who acts like a dick all the time.

That guy rick is an utter wank stain.

by Sheggles2point0 April 22, 2018

Wank team 6

When you are sleeping next to a loves one and you need to run one out, you roll over to one side and masturbate undetected.

Oh man, last night I had to sleep with me mum. I had to call in Wank team 6 and everything.

by Dyank MeyMeys December 21, 2016

Pokey bum wank

To insert ones finger in and out of the anus whilst masterbating ones penis with the other hand (speed and deph of finger is upto pbw,sters preference)

Tom:have you heard about something called a pokey bum wank its all the rage ooop north any idea what it involves
Rich: yes its the act of slipping a appendage or inanimate object up ones anus whilst wanking the penis with the other hand

I was doing a prison sentence a normal wank just wasnt doing it for me after 6 months of repetitive standard wanking so I was looking to spice things upby using a finger or 2 after 3 months fingers became boring so I started a long trawl of finding inanimate objects to insert and rating them out of ten is my final ambition to write up a pbw guide of best objects to use for a pbw with a ratings scale of shitty fingers so electric toothbrush 9 and a half shitty fingers out of ten

by Jack Mehoff jizz mater general November 20, 2016

Winnie the Pooh wank

The act of masturbating, while only wearing a tshirt, and being totally naked from the waste down. Made famous by Winnie The Pooh who never wore bottoms.

I had a Winnie The Pooh wank last night, tshirt on and nothing else.

by RichieBigTits December 14, 2022