Houdini bag wank

When one places themselves in a hold-all, zips it up and secures with a padlock. Once secured in the bag, you wank yourself into oblivion and finally try to escape.

Sorry I’m late for work boss, I decided to try a Houdini bag wank this morning.

by Jim’ll fist it February 12, 2023

Wanking my Willy

a male masturbating

"I'm wanking my willy to your moms big tits"

by cumshotter June 28, 2022

Wanked all over

Occurs mainly whilst playing any form of game or even if you feel like it in everyday life

I was playing a game of FIFA and I wanked all over some nit but he got the win

You better fuck off before I wank all over you
I was playing chess and I got that motherfucker in checkmate needless to say he was about to be wanked all over

by torkyj February 04, 2020

30,000 Feet Wank

To jerk off in the airplanes bathroom, specifically mid flight.

Guy 1: I just did the 30,000 Feet wank
Guy 2: Who are you? Why are you telling me this?

by Whatconstipationlookslike October 31, 2020

International Wank Day

The day of December 1st, following the month of No Nut November, where every male is encouraged to masturbate, to relieve the testicular tension of the previous month.

Person 1: Bro can you come to the game tomorrow.
Person 2: Nah sorry bro it’s International Wank Day.
Person 1: Damn bro why didn’t you remind me?

by Bongonog November 12, 2019

wank n shank

When you shank someone right after you rape them. Commonly used in prison situations.

Inmate 1: Did you hear about inmate 3?
Inmate 2: No, what happened?
Inmate 1: He attempted to do the ol' wank n shank

by that_one_guy1 June 03, 2016

Wanking off a Smurf

When people have blue hands which have been dyed with ink, paint etc they are said to have wanked off a smurf.

Why are your hands blue? Have you been wanking off a smurf or something?

by thanksthatsastupidsuggestion March 07, 2021