Skip to main content

Coffee Lag

The duration between the first sip of coffee and the body's reaction to caffeine. Generally, the speaker forces actions/words to come out faster than neural transmission without the aid of a catalyst (i.e., caffeine).

Though applicable throughout the workday, coffee lag is especially perilous during the early hours, such as the morning commute, team meetings, and pseudo-serious conversations about life.

Symptoms include rambling speech, awkward gestures, and grand delusions of vacation (often resembles daydreaming). Note: coffee lag in an attractive person can be misdiagnosed as a hot mess.
Bob: "...and-when-I-go-to-desk-I-make-copies-of-things-where-I-think-that-we-need-to-see-more-of-each-other-and-I-know-you-like-me-but-I'm-still-working-and-need-more-time-to-get-these-forms-back-to-you..."

Jane: "So what I think what you're saying is that you need a deadline extension...?"

Bob: (sips coffee)

Jane: "I'll just come back after your coffee lag wears off."
by TexicanAg01 December 8, 2010
mugGet the Coffee Lag mug.

Coffee and a muffin before bed

A euphemism for sex despite one's partner(s) being tired.
Would you like some coffee and a muffin before bed?
by folken0 July 13, 2011
mugGet the Coffee and a muffin before bed mug.

coffee poaching

The act of pulling out the coffee pot in mid-brew and letting it drip into your cup. This is a common office foul that either dilutes the entire batch of coffee for the rest of the office or caused it to be much more robust.
Kevin's been coffee poaching again. This batch taste watered down!
by twowheeler1300 April 25, 2011
mugGet the coffee poaching mug.

caffiend

(CALF-feend)

A hybrid between the two words Caffeine and Fiend (as in crack fiend). Your typical Caffiend is characterized by one or more of these behaviors.

1. They will get extremely irritable if denied their daily dose of coffee, tea, soda, or any other products that contain caffeine.

2. In addition to the above behavior, some caffiends may find themselves spending large amounts of their income on all manner of energy drinks, no doz, and other products with higher concentrations of their favorite drug, in an attempt to find more energy and vigor, as their tolerance for caffeinated beverages has by this time almost certainly rendered all but the most powerful sources useless in their never-ending thirst for the next best pick me up.

3. Going without sleep and replacing it with caffeine is probably the most common sign that you or someone you know is or is becoming a caffiend.
Office employee A : "Jeez, Timothy looks like he hasn't slept for days!"

Office employee B : "He hasn't. Each morning he comes into work, heads to the break room, and drinks the whole pitcher full of coffee! What a caffiend!"

Office employee A : " Your telling me"
by SpudTheCrud November 22, 2013
mugGet the caffiend mug.

Coffee cup philosopher

A person who recites the sayings from coffee cups and acts like they have figured out the meaning of life
by Livinthelife May 31, 2015
mugGet the Coffee cup philosopher mug.

Coffee talk

Coffe talk- things not important enough for a biography, yet too important for text.
Let’s save this for coffee talk
by Realcoffeetalk June 24, 2018
mugGet the Coffee talk mug.

coffee chats

Person A: "I'm going to reach out to my favorite startup founder to hear her insight and to develop a friendship"

Person B: "You should invite her out for a cup of coffee. Coffee chats are both casual and professional. But don't go where they play elevator music."
by Priyana July 22, 2018
mugGet the coffee chats mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email