apology rape

when someone corners you and forces you to listen to their ridiculously out of touch self centered apology that does nothing especially when they will certainly repeat the same actions that led to the unwanted situation or results (having already done so many times)

ah man that boomer apology raped Theresa for 35 minutes about how he has a condition and couldn't help her sort those 3lb boxes in the stock room.

by TheClockJokerX April 18, 2021

Apology Picnic

When you mess up and take your girl on a picnic as an apology.

-you messed up big time bro.
-yeah man, i know. i think i'll have to have an apology picnic or something to get back on her good side.

by pika007 May 2, 2011

Period Apology

That moment when you apologize for your period or period symptoms – even though you sure as heck shouldn’t.

Your period is a natural part of you, so let’s ditch the Period Apology, shall we?

by #NoApologiesPeriod June 8, 2021

Proud Man's Apology

When someone suddenly starts acting very nice to someone after doing something wrong, instead of actually apologising.

Sam: "Mike humiliated me in front of my girl! He's tried to be extra nice since, but he never apologised"
Paul: "That's a Proud Man's Apology, some guys don't know how to say the word sorry"

by andyBwilson May 22, 2020

I'm not apologizing

You aren't owed an apology breeder and stealing my shit is just going to get me to murder your kids. It isn't in the past.

Hym "I'm not being forced to do anything (yet) and I'm not apologizing. Seriously. Fuck your shitty kids. If you weren't such a piece of shit they would get killed less BUT INSTEAD... You have to lie about mental illness. It isn't a mental illness. What you are doing here called into question the very notion of mental illness. You're making Jordan cry with this shit. And there's the 'yeah, whatever' because that's all you are as a person. That's the entire depth of your being."

A retard "The depth of YOUR being is HATE" 😡

Hym "Totally sane and is a legitimate response to the words I just said. AND it's reflective of the FACT that you're kids should live forever, have a better life than me, and never get molested. CLEARLY!"

by Hym Iam March 2, 2025

Hancock apology

To make an apology for something relatively insubstantial, even mostly irrelevant, while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge something more grievous.

Bonus points if the apology is insultingly insincere and the apologist demands privacy and respect.

Named after Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care of the UK, who was filmed having an extramarital romantic liaison - kissing and groping - an aide he personally hired. Hancock refused to acknowledge the romantic and sexual element of this interaction and, instead, chose to apologise for "breaching social distancing guidelines." He then asked for privacy for this "personal matter", alluding to the alleged affair sighted, while completely refusing to acknowledge the affair.

Jane: "You cheated on me over 15 years, murdered my mother, and stole all of my money. Why did you do all of this, you wasteman?"

Matt: "To invoke the Hancock apology, I am sorry that I ate all of your green Gummy Bear sweets. It was very wrong of me and I apologise. I would now like you to respect my privacy on this personal matter."

by BroJayDee June 26, 2021

rapist's apology

When someone "apologizes" by saying something along the lines of "I don't remember doing this/it happening like that, but if I did do that I'm sorry."
Basically it's when someone fakes their way out of an apology so they can feel better about themselves.

"Did you confront Amy about what she said about you?"
"Yeah, she tried to get out of it with a rapist's apology but I didn't let her get away with it."

by maraspopheacj July 28, 2018